nothing would ever happen

3sixty5:1

2009-10-13T19:19:00.000-07:00

I've decided to chronicle my first year living in NYC by participating in 365...a daily photo project. The idea is simple--one picture a day for a year. I'll take more, and I might even post more. But I do plan to post my 365 project photos here.

My apartment building in the early morning light.

Big Yellow

2009-07-13T20:04:00.000-07:00

It could be a play, one where the script changes every night, but the themes and lessons remain the same.

The Setting: The living room of a big, yellow, Victorian house in a quintessential New England college town. There are comfortable couches and wooden rocking chairs, family pictures and well-loved instruments tucked in the corners. Snacks are waiting on the table and tea is in the cupboard. It feels like home from the moment you arrive.

The Soundtrack: The tapping of laptop keys, the heavy thud of small feet, joyful squeals of delight, and the occasional wail...the hum of acoustic guitars bouncing off the bathroom walls, the stomp of a foot keeping time, the scratch of the pen against paper...the stroke of the hour, the occasional siren...lots of laughter and a few tears.

The Characters: A rotating cast of poets, songwriters, memoirists, and bloggers...all storytellers who create worlds and bring them to life.

The Story: There is a refrain in the great baseball movie Field of Dreams.

If you build it, he will come.

It started with the house and a vision. And so the house's residents (first only one, then two--plus dog, then three, and finally four--plus dog again) created the space. She built it and they came--the writers. The house fills up on various weeknights, and sometimes for whole weekends full of time. Time for the people to tell stories and share pieces of themselves. Time to build and maintain friendships and community. Time to heal deep wounds. There are stories of love and of loss, of the struggle to find oneself and of losing everything. Stories about coming of age, and stories of dragons and vampires.

Some of these storytellers come season after season, while others come and go. But each of them join the whispers in the walls and the muses in the shadows. They provide the inspiration and the encouragement for those who come next.

3-0

2009-04-21T19:46:00.000-07:00

I know I'm a few days behind on Look Up, but tonight, I want to Look Out and Look Around. Tomorrow, I turn 30. Age is really just a number to me, so 30 isn't causing the earth to shift beneath my feet or my inner equilibrium to tremble. 30 doesn't sound all that different from 29 and I suspect it won't feel much different either. Something about the "milestone" is causing me to look back though.

My 20s are almost over--and while I stand here looking back at them as a whole and happy person, there were times when that didn't seem possible. I don't remember turning 20--even then, "milestones" must not have meant much. I know I was in college. I know I was happy. I know I trusted in where I was. I moved to California shortly after I turned 22 and all of that change. Sometimes, those years feel like a blur--and I know that I suffered the quintessential quarter-life crisis. I didn't like where I was and I didn't trust where I was going.

***

This weekend, I spent time in one of my favorite towns, in one of my favorite houses, with some of my favorite people--two of whom are under 3 feet tall. For the last year, my most frequent question for the almost-3 year old is, "Lila, who's my favorite two year old in the whole world?" She grins, balls her hand into a thumbs-up position, and jabs her thumb into her chest. We were in the kitchen on Saturday when she said, "Hey Kris! Who's my favorite two year old in the whole world?"

"I don't know. Who?"

She grinned at me, scrunched up her face and pointed at me.

The next morning, I sat on the front porch with her little brother, wrapped in a fleece blanket against the cool April breeze. We watched the cars, waved to the people and dogs who walked by, and sang endless verses of Peter Paul and Mary's "Car-Car." I soaked in the moment, grateful for and aware of the happiness and peace that I took for granted when I entered my 20s. My years in California were hard, but they gave me such a gift. I'm more present for the good things in life, and for the people who fill my life.

***

I'm not sure what my 30s will bring, but I enter them more comfortable (OK, more comfortable-ish) with the uncertainty and more confident that I can handle whatever comes my way. And I still say age is just a number. After all, I'm somebody's favorite 2 year old in the whole world.

Look Up 4/16

2009-04-16T19:18:00.000-07:00

And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood

Look Up

2009-04-15T20:20:00.000-07:00

Jury Duty, Worcester County Courthouse

Look Up

2009-04-14T20:45:00.000-07:00

Birds on a Wire

Look Up Series

2009-04-13T20:05:00.001-07:00

I had my wisdom teeth out last Thursday, then went home for Easter. So here are the "make-up" photos.

Look Up 4/9--Springing

Look Up 4/10--O'Kane Hall

Look Up 4/11 (Princeton, NJ)

Look Up 4/12 (OK, this is cheating, a little. But *he* is looking up! This is my brother's best friend, just home from almost a year in Chile.)

Look Up 4/13--Atop the Hotel Northampton

"Spring"

2009-04-08T18:39:00.000-07:00

Spring in New England: Rain fell from the sky today. So did snow. It was cloudy. It was sunny. It was cold. Spring needs to make up her mind.

Look Up

Stars and Stripes

2009-04-07T21:12:00.000-07:00

In evening light

Welcome to Holy Cross

2009-04-06T20:00:00.000-07:00

Look up...

Look Up 4/5

2009-04-05T20:43:00.000-07:00

At my apartment...

Look Up...

2009-04-04T19:29:00.001-07:00

...and see fake spring at the Natick Mall.

Forgive me...

2009-04-03T20:24:00.000-07:00

...I won't apron-wring. But it rained ALL DAY today.

Here's the very old pressed tin ceiling in my office...and the sprinkler system.

Look Up...

2009-04-02T17:48:00.000-07:00

...and see the blue sky.

Look Up

2009-04-01T20:11:00.000-07:00

Inspired by an artistic friend and a creative "stranger," I've decided to post a photo every day in April. All too often, we look down. We see our feet and the asphalt. We see dirt. So let's look up this spring. You never know what you'll see.

A bit of green...

2009-03-17T20:48:00.000-07:00

I have a few actual posts that I've been meaning to make, and I hope to get to them later this week. But for tonight, a bit o' the green...

Edamame

Blanket

FRFF ticket

Ice cream (yum!)

Soaps

Sweater

Pen

O'bama sticker

While I love St. Patrick's Day, there's also a little bit of sadness on 3/17. 8 years ago today, my friend Tim's twin brother was killed in a car accident. He and 4 friends were heading to New Orleans on their spring break to volunteer at a school. Chris and 2 of his friends were killed in that accident by a 25-year old kid, driving drunk on the wrong side of the highway. At Chris' wake, I took a copy of his "Statement of Life Aspirations" which he had written in high school. It's still tacked to my bulletin board at work. Chris articulated my own heart much more clearly than I ever could.

"to touch the life of a person, to help them see the world in a better light, to enable them to live a fuller, more productive life; i would like to do something like this. i am searching for a profession that will enable me to inspire, to help, to enlighten, to leave my mark on the human race. i will live a full and vibrant life, doing whatever i see fit, not conforming, not rejecting...my life will belong to me and it will be great not for the fame and fortune i receive, but for the lives i help change an the happiness i achieve."

~christopher a. hoppe (may 4, 1981-march 17, 2001)

on our way home

2009-02-01T21:41:00.000-08:00

Another fabulous, fun, special, sacred weekend in that big, warm, cozy, yellow house. I laughed til it hurt, I sang and I danced, and I even cried a little. And oh yeah, I changed a lot of diapers--some more successfully than others!

Friday night, I arrived a little early, greeted Nerissa and headed upstairs to relieve Erica. I took the kids and we headed downstairs to wait for the writers. I had reminded L about all of our friends, naming each of them for her. When we got downstairs, I asked her if she remembered who was coming..."who's coming?" she replied. "Is Bill coming?" "Yes." "Is Lora coming?" "Yes." "Is Fred coming?" "Yes!" "He is?! Who's Fred?" High pitched giggles followed and she ran laps around the downstairs shrieking "Fred's coming! Fred is coming!!" J just watched and smiled big. Lora arrived, followed by all of our other friends. L got a little shy, so Mike took Mr. J and I snuggled L. Ashley and Melissa came to say hello..."meow!" L took on her cat persona, and because they are wonderful, our friends played along. She warmed up pretty quickly and soon, she was yelling across the room and calling them names. Reluctant to eat her own dinner, L got very excited about my rice and green beans. Hey, as long as she eats, right?

When the writers began their work, Tom and I headed upstairs with the kids. I read L a book and we cuddled a little bit before Tom and I switched off and I headed to try to put J down for the night. We read a book and I softly began to sing to him...he didn't so much love when I put him in the crib, but I stayed close and he held my thumb in his little hand while I sang another round of "Molly the Donkey." He protested when I left the room (still singing), but by the time I closed the door to the stairs, he was off in dreamland. Tom helped me in the kitchen for a while...then it was off to Packard's.

We insisted on the library room, agreeing to pass drinks if the room felt too crowded. Every corner split off into its own conversation, but there was a general feeling of community in that room. Snow fell outside the window while we ate gross (but delicious) food, drank everything from virgin bloody marys to 007s, and laughed loudly and often.

Saturday was a blur of diaper changes, guitar strums, endless rounds of "We're Off to See the Wizard!" (complete with dancing), food, friends, and a long car ride on which L and I "hootenanny boogied." A fairly competitive game of Ataturk ended our night together (Lora and Tracie proved to be a dynamic duo), but we dragged Bill back to our hotel for drinks and guitar.

Sunday morning came too quickly...the writers wrote and sang while I cuddled and sang and danced and rolled with J upstairs. Tom and L returned in time for a rendition of "Enough Said," which I sang with a girl in my lap and tears in my eyes. After a few rounds of "Pig Pile on L" (possibly my favorite moment of the weekend occurred when L looked at me and whispered, "Kwis, do you think Beel wants to play pig pile on me?), we took some group photos--which came out great for once--and headed for our last traditional haunt. (But not before L and I said goodbye--"I love you, Fingers!" I called to her. "I love you, Feet!" she replied with a grin.) Tokyo and Taipei was our last stop and we squeezed another hour out of our time together. I'd never been so grateful for carpooling, as Tracie, Nichole and I extended that retreat feeling just a *little* bit longer as we drove back to the Woo.

I don't want to forget the feeling that accompanies this weekend, the magic and electricity that fills the room when we are all sitting together eating dinner or listening to a song. I am so grateful for all the little moments that add up to a big memory--dishes in the kitchen with Tom, cuddling up with L & J to read a story, a quiet conversation in the corner at Packard's with Melissa, late night lyrics-on-the-fly with Bill and Tracie, me frozen at the top of the stairs with J in my arms listening to Bill's beautiful story, last minute alcohol runs with Tracie to the "package store" that sells individual bottles of beer, watching closely as L sings every word of "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" with Tracie, Teresa presenting L & N with Polly the Monkey, the Brewery waitress who never wrote anything down and brought all the right things, looking around the room at dinnertime and seeing everyone so engaged and happy...

In 3 short years, we've become our own little family.

Thumbs Up

2009-01-20T20:23:00.000-08:00

Thumbs up, indeed, Miss Sasha. Your daddy did good today.

"For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and traveled across oceans in search of a new life.

For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and plowed the hard earth.

For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn.

Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.

...

As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals.

...

To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history; but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist.

...

For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies. It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job, which sees us through our darkest hours. It is the firefighter's courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent's willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate.

Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends -- hard work and honesty, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism -- these things are old. These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history. What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility -- a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation, and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character, than giving our all to a difficult task.

This is the price and the promise of citizenship."

I watched the Inauguration in the pub on the ground floor of our campus center. Hundreds of students sat with faculty members, administrators, and coaches. There was chatter as Vice President Biden took the Oath of Office, but when CNN quietly announced that regardless of the fact he had not yet taken his own oath, because it was past noon, Barack Obama was officially President of the United States, a roar erupted in the room. Everyone fell quiet as the Chief Justice and the Obamas were called forward, and while there was a giggle when the Chief Justice flubbed his lines, you could hear a pin drop in the room. "So help me God..." and the room exploded again with cheers and applause and laughter. Silence fell for the inaugural address, which everyone knew was partially penned by our fellow Crusader, Jon Favreau. You've never seen college kids so quiet!

The crowd in Washington was awe-inspiring as well. Seeing all of those people together, some crying, some smiling so big their faces may be frozen that way tonight, reminded me of a song my kids used to sing for Black History Month. We saw it today. Yes, We Can.

Lift every voice and sing,
'Til earth and heaven ring,
Ring with the harmonies of Liberty;
Let our rejoicing rise
High as the listening skies,
Let it resound loud as the rolling sea.
Sing a song full of the faith that the dark past has taught us,
Sing a song full of the hope that the present has brought us;
Facing the rising sun of our new day begun,
Let us march on 'til victory is won.

God of our weary years,
God of our silent tears,
Thou who has brought us thus far on the way;
Thou who has by Thy might
Led us into the light,
Keep us forever in the path, we pray.
Lest our feet stray from the places, our God, where we met Thee,
Lest, our hearts drunk with the wine of the world, we forget Thee;
Shadowed beneath Thy hand,
May we forever stand,
True to our God,
True to our native land.

Another Monday night...

2009-01-16T17:33:00.000-08:00

A great leaf, that God and you and I/ have covered with writing/ turns now, overhead, in strange hands.

I anticipate their questions --

Why did you leave?
Why did you stay away?

Why do you want to come back?

I had to leave. I needed air. I needed to heal. I lived, breathed, ate, drank, swam in teaching. Three thousand miles from home, living in a small apartment with three other teachers, the classroom kept me sane and drove me crazy. It was an oxygen mask and a pillow over my face. I was exhausted.

I left to come home - to return to a coast and a mindset that made sense. I left to be with family and friends who knew me. I left because as much as I loved it, as much as I loved them, I felt spent and depleted. My batteries needed to be recharged.

I never meant to stay away so long. I almost came back, but I wasn't quite ready. The scars were still too pink, and the memories were a little to raw. My thoughts were of the hours, the planning, the grading, and the discipline. So I picked another road - a familiar one. I returned to the place that had filled me with the desire and the passion that fueled my teaching in the first place. It was a job that could be left in an office - with tasks that could wait until morning. I found other ways to fill my evenings. And I wrote...but not about planning, or grading, or discipline. Instead, the stories that poured onto the pages and filled notebooks were about the laughter, and the lightbulbs, and the joy. The flood of memories told the story of second grade magic.

So, I'm coming back because I want to come back. I'm coming back with a balanced understanding of the challenges and the rewards. I recognize my responsibilities to my students and to myself - we'll all be happier if I don't live, breathe, eat, and drink my job. Most importantly, I come back knowing that this is what I'm meant to do, whether in a little town that feels more like home than anyplace I've been in my adult life, or the city I never wanted to live in until I left...even on the days that end in tears.

The Day After Thanksgiving...

2008-11-28T22:24:00.000-08:00

And I am most grateful...
...for a crazy, loving, funny, over-the-top Irish family.
...for friends who make me laugh.
...for creativity.
...for friends with babies, toddlers, and kids.
...for President-Elect Barack Obama.
...for those people in my life who remind me of all I have to give.
...for health.
...for cousins.
...for email and cell phones and blogs and facebook and all the wonderful ways available to me to keep in touch with far-flung friends and family.
...for fleece blankets.
...for heating pads.
...for tween girls (but not for their shrieking).
...for hope.

Dayenu.

randomly and weirdly me

2008-11-23T18:35:00.000-08:00

I am behind on blogging, but I'll be blogging 2x tonight as I've been tagged in 2 "surveys."

The lovely and talented Melissa has tagged me for a Random and Weirdly Me post!

Here are the rules:
1. Link to your tagger and list these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about yourself, some random, some weird.
3 Tag 7 people (if possible) at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
4. Let them know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blogs.

Without further ado ... here are my seven random and weird ...

1. I had 6 toes on each foot at birth. (2 big toes on each foot!)
2. I had a hard time learning to dive (into a pool), but once my younger sister figured it out, it took me about a day and a half.
3. I tend to forget things--keys, jackets, medication...deodorant (not often)!
4. I talk to myself...often. It's how I think things through.
5. I still contemplate going back to school for an M.Div. or somesuch degree. It's especially appealing after a weekend like this one where I helped to facilitate a retreat.
6. I am currently drinking Polar beverage's "Orange Dry." (Yes, I'm struggling to come up with 7 facts.)
7. I "stole" tin foil this weekend. Yes, there is a funny story there.

I tag:

My blog friends have been tapped already!

Election Eve Musings

2008-11-03T21:25:00.001-08:00

On the first Tuesday in November...2004...I voted first thing in the morning and went about the rest of my day without a second thought. After work, I headed to the victory party for Maryland congressman Chris Van Hollen--no butterflies, no worries. I was ready to watch states turn from gray to blue...or red...and then listen to Chris' victory speech. After all, he was running in Montgomery County, Maryland...and he was a Democrat. No worries. We got to Chris' party early, grabbed a drink and some seats at a table in the corner. We stacked a few plates with appetizers and talked about the day, occasionally stealing a glance at the 12 foot high, 25 foot long wall of television screens along the back of the room. At about 7 o'clock, we noticed that people were standing five deep, eyes fixed on the TV screens. States were flipping from gray to red at an alarming rate. We saw what was happening, and slowly, people started to leave. Chris had won. He hadn't even arrived at his party yet, and we were leaving. No one looked up--we stared at the ground and quietly climbed into our cars.

Over the next few days, it felt as if we were living in a parallel universe. Sure, the Democrats had run a stuffed shirt whose entire political strategy hinged on saying, "George W. Bush will do X, Y, and Z...and I won't!" Sure, he hadn't done much to tell us what he would do but, but he was running against George.W.Bush. If you lived inside the Washington Beltway, or in any other blue bubble on the east and west coast, you were shell-shocked.

Here we are, four years later, and I feel as though I'm experiencing some kind of post-traumatic stress disorder. I've been anxious and terrified for the last year. I can't watch the news--Wolf Blitzer, Joe Scarborough, Tom Brokaw, Meredith Vieira, Chris Matthews and Keith Olbermann, Mika Brzezinski--they all make me crazy--though I do miss Tim Russert. If Tim were here, Sarah Palin couldn't have avoided Meet the Press, and he'd have eviscerated her in that "small town," Buffalo, intelligent, Jesuit-educated way he had...and he'd have done it smiling sweetly. I might feel better about this election. I do watch Jon Stewart though. He's my saving grace in the madness, though these days, his own anxiety and fury are barely veiled by humor.

Tomorrow is it. And I am convinced that our country does not need a Joe-6-Pack, a Nancy-the-Teacher, a Joe-the-Plumber, or a Sarah-the -Hockey-Mom as President. We don't need someone "just like us"--we need an extraordinary person with extraordinary vision. We're living in a dark and twisty, scary and damaged, broken world...and we need some hope.

But I worry. I worry about long lines. I worry that Colorado will see North Carolina and/or Virginia go blue and not bother to vote. I worry because polls had Barack Obama beating Hillary Clinton by double digits in New Hampshire, and she turned around and beat him. I worry that people are racists, that people still believe he's a Muslim (as if there's something wrong with that), and a terrorist. I worry about "undecideds"--as my friend Bill said to me today, "HOW CAN SOMEONE STILL BE UNDECIDED????" I try to remember an email I received a few weeks ago. It's a picture of Barack Obama at the convention, arm extended in that "Obaman" way. The caption reads: EVERYONE CHILL THE FUCK OUT. I GOT THIS!

And still I worry. I worry about what happens if we DO get President Barack Obama this January. I worry that people have bought into this Messiah complex and actually expect him to be perfect. I like Barack Obama--I'd be thrilled if he were my president. But a few months ago, I voted for Hillary Clinton in the primary. I wish I could have voted for both of them, but I had grown tired of the media turning Hillary into a schoolyard bully, while Barack was an innocent kid who'd never played the political game. I worry that his imperfections, his humanity, will be amplified to those who believe he can save our country and the world by Christmas 2009.

Tomorrow night, I plan to watch election returns with my friend Nichole. There will be a beer in my hand. I try to remind myself that, no matter what happens, I will wake up on Wednesday and go to work. No matter what happens, I will meet Matt and Rachel's teeny, perfect, sweet baby twins on Saturday. No matter what happens, life will go on. (Though in my most freaked out moments, I have visions of a 269-269 tie, or counting votes on Wednesday and Thursday and beyond.)

And then I remember what I learned this morning, watching the only "news" I can bear to see--ESPN. The Pittsburgh Steelers are playing the Washington Redskins tonight on Monday Night Football. The game is in Washington. In the last FIFTEEN elections, the 'Skins last home game has been an accurate predictor. If the 'Skins win, the incumbent party holds the White House. If the 'Skins lose, the challenging party wins the White House.

So, if you are so inclined, root for the Steelers tonight...and if they lose, remember that these kinds of "records" are meant to be broken.

(EDITED TO SAY--STEELERS WIN!!!)

Yankee Stadium

2008-09-21T20:58:00.000-07:00

I feel like I just watched a piece of my childhood die. The last game (most likely) in Yankee Stadium. Growing up, the Yankees were among the worst teams in baseball. There were names like Stump Merrill, Alvaro Espinoza, Steve Sax, Mel Hall and Jesse Barfield. But it didn't matter to me, didn't matter in my household. The Yankees were my mom's team--my Nana and my Pa's team. We sat along the 3rd baseline in my dad's work seats. We saw a lot of losses in those days, but we didn't care...the sky seemed bluer and the grass seemed greener in Yankee Stadium. My sister, my brother and I would listen to my parents recount their own stories about Yankee Stadium.

And there was Don Mattingly. #23 was the favorite of almost every child in the tri-state area. I fell asleep every night from about 3rd grade through high school to the sound of Phil Rizzuto's voice, calling the games on the radio ("and the ball goes RIGHT THROUGH Espinoza's legs at short!" was a nightly ritual).

Then came the mid-90s. Joe Torre, Derek Jeter, Paul O'Neill, Bernie Williams, Jorge Posada, Andy Pettitte and Mariano Rivera...their names are now the stuff of Yankee legends. I went to my first Yankee game in years (darn living out of state) last year, and had to wait until the bottom of the 9th to see a walk-off grand slam. In my only game this year, my last game at Yankee Stadium, my dad, uncle and I stuck it out again for a walk-off, 2 out, bottom of the 9th homer. We sat in my sister's seats--upper deck, right behind home plate--we could see the entire Stadium. Good way to say goodbye.

Tonight's game started with a tribute to the great Yankees of the past. Mantle, Maris, Gehrig, Rizzuto, O'Neill, . And of course, the biggest ovation of all was for Bernie Williams. The last game pretty perfect--Andy Pettitte gets the win, Jeter left the game to a standing O and Enter Sandman blared through the speakers as Mariano Rivera got the close. Watching those guys tonight, especially as they took a final lap around Yankee Stadium, as Jeter, Rivera, Posada and Pettitte stood together on the mound for a photo op.

Someday, I'll take my own kids to the new Yankee Stadium. And it will be magical, and it will be majestic, and it will be wonderful. I'll watch their faces as they take it in for the first time, wearing t-shirts bearing the numbers and names of their favorite players, kids who are only in high school and even middle school right now. But I'll point across the street...and I'll tell them about MY Yankee Stadium, the Stadium where their grandparents and great-grandparents and great-great grandparents watched the Yankees. I'll tell them about Don Mattingly, Derek Jeter and Mariano Rivera. I'll tell them about the walk-off homeruns I witnessed...and the many many losses too.

Goodbye, Yankee Stadium. Thanks for the memories.

(Note to self...don't post tired...I'll be back to fix glaring errors and bad grammar later.)

Cancer sucks

2008-08-21T18:37:00.000-07:00

When my mom called me on Friday to say that my friend Dana had called my house in NJ looking for my cell phone number, I knew Erin was gone. She was diagnosed with liver cancer about 3 years ago, had a transplant back in December, but never really got better.

I met Erin in high school. She'd gone to grammar school with Dana--and D and I had become fast friends. Erin had an easy smile and was truly one of the nicest people I've ever known. I'm not sure if she ever said a bad or negative thing about anyone. You couldn't help but like her. We lost touch after college, but Dana kept me updated on her health. I always meant to send Erin a card or a package...and always though I'd have more time.

Yup, cancer sucks. Tell me again why we're spending gazillions in Iraq???

Sunday Sixteen

2008-08-03T19:45:00.000-07:00

I owe y'all at least a 16 after 6 weeks away!

1. Work is insane right now. This is my first summer with the writing gig...and every year, I think "summer can't get any busier." And every year, it does.

2. My trip to LA was amazing. I visited my old school--my kids are now 7th, 8th and 9th graders!! I caught up with a few friends and spent a LOT of time with my CA family. Problem with that is that I miss them more than ever now--I'd forgotten how wonderful it is to sit on their old, worn, faded, blue couch (my bed on many a night during my years in LA) and just be. They are some of my favorite, most cherished people in this world. I also got to see our dear T twice!

3. I completed my 2nd triathlon last month. This one was down the Cape, in Falmouth. I loved it...the water was warm (I didn't look insane for wearing a speedo), the bike course was great, there was a fog bank holding off the sun, the run was FLAT. My bike chain fell off on a downhill as I shifted gears, so that was a bummer, but the rest of it was great. I hope to do that race every year.

4. Falcon Ridge was an adventure this year. Tracie, Nic, my friend Ali and I planned to leave Wednesday after work, but as Wednesday approached, the weather websites forecasted rain of Biblical proportions. So, we had a sleepover at my house on Wendesday night waited until Thursday. When we arrived, we were told we couldn't drive up the hill to our campsite (rhi and Steven had already staked our spot) so we had to triage our supplies and decide what we really needed (tents, sleeping bags, a change of clothes) and make the trek through the mud and water a couple of times.

5. Luckily, the weather could not stop the fantastic music: Crooked Still, Red Molly, Jason Spooner Trio and all our old favorites. We took our now-annual-trip-to-the-waterfall on Friday, basked in whatever sunshine we could find and spent a lot of time singing along.

6. Every year, I walk away from Falcon Ridge saying, "I forgot how much I loved X." One year, it was the Nields, one year Tracy Grammer...this year, it's Eddie from Ohio. My goodness! Luckily, our friend fumblerette made me a few EFO mixes that are giving me my fix. Right now, there's nothing better than Julie Murphy Wells singing, "I'm an Irish woman, I love weddings and funerals, beginnings and endings, the front and the back."

7. I discovered the FRFF showers this year. Thank you, Tracie, you've changed my life.

8. Saturday night, the rain returned. We'd enjoyed an evening of Nerissa and Katryna, Dar, EFO and Martin Sexton, but the sky was flashing. Ali and I decided to sleep in the car--I don't play around with lightning. But of course, that meant less sleeping and more uncomfortably shifting around all night, trying to catch 30 minutes of sleep in between. The next morning, N checked the iPhone (we aren't *that* dirty hippy) and we decided to go down for the Gospel Wake-Up (possibly the best hour of the weekend), return to camp to finish the pack-up, drive down the hill, catch Tracy Grammer's mainstage set and leave before the rain started. But the second we parked at the bottom of the hill, the thunder rumbled--we braved it anyway (we were hungry) until we started getting pelted with *hail*!!! And so ended our FRFF experience...we fled the scene and our 90 minute drive to the Woo only took us 4 hours.

9. I came home from FRFF, spent a few days at the office, then headed down the Cape to spend some time with my family on the tail end of their 2 week vacation. Nothing like my parents, my sister, my grandmother, my mom's sister and my dad's brother in one house! Actually, I love it. My other grandmother (dad's mom who passed away a few years ago) and my uncle (the one who was with us on this vaca) came on every vacation with us from the time I was 8 until I was about 18.

10. Summer is more than half over! Not sure how that happened, but I have a few more good trips planned. In less than 2 weeks, Tracie, Nic and I are headed to one of my favorite places on earth--and A&G are meeting us there! I lived in MD one summer during college, and my mom's cousin was building this house on the eastern shore--I love it there and can't wait to share it with friends. I also can't wait to eat crab!

11. The following weekend, I think I'll be down the Jersey Shore. My sister and her friends rent a house every summer and spend their weekends there--I've been meaning to go for 2 years now. I love Cape Cod and all, but the Jersey shore has waves that knock you down--and knock your suit off!

12. I'm on the hunt for a place to go horseback riding. So far, I've found only one place in MA, though I'll keep looking in CT and RI, maybe even NH. I haven't been on a horse in a few years and if I could find a place to ride once a month or every other month, I'd be a pretty happy camper.

13. My cousin and her kids have officially moved from London to NY!! Minty's almost 6 and Ned is almost 4--they arrived on July 1 and I spent the 4th and 5th of July with them. I'm looking forward to seeing a lot more of them.

14. I recently saw a foot doctor to see if he could help me with my ankle and knee pain (which I'm fairly certain originates with my wide, flat feet). He wants to try a few things before orthotics, including a night splint. Yeah...you try sleeping in this.

15. My goal for the end of September is to have my Massachusetts and New York teaching credentials in order.

16. I am counting down to the last weekend in January.

Sunday Send-off

2008-06-15T19:52:00.000-07:00

I leave for Los Angeles on Tuesday. Apparently, 4 years is just the right amount of emotional distance, because I'm actually excited about this trip! I am looking forward to doing what I *want* to do and seeing who I *want* to see. I get to see Teresa! I get to eat at my favorite restaurants! (Ethiopian food, Wahoo's Fish Tacos, In N Out burger, Bay Cities Deli!!!) I get to see the people in LA that I actually enjoy.

But, I've been remiss in blogging, as I was reminded today. I realized that I never posted pics from my trip to Atlanta (of which I don't have many).

View from my hotel room:
Flowers in March (when it was still frosty in MA):
At the suggestion of an alum from the HC Class of '56, a resident of Atlanta and a good buddy of mine, GretaJane and I hit up the Cyclorama (which was surprisingly cool!):
It was a fun trip!!

Next photos are from today. I headed to Providence bright and early this morning to paint Matt and Rachel's new house!! It was a full day, but I had fun painting with Matt, Rachel's mom, Nic, Tracie and their friend Ralph. Rachel ordered our lunch and brought us drinks, and did some packing at the current house since paint fumes are bad for the babies!!

(See before and after videos here:
Before
&
After)

Here are a few pics:
A rare photo of moi:
The finished study (it's more terracotta than orange in real life):

Ralph painting the master bedroom a lovely cloudy sky blue:
Nic and Tracie paint the guest room "winsome lilac":
Babies' room, yet to be painted...these are the options. Also, Rachel and Stephanie hanging out in the babies' room.

Alright, all. I took tomorrow off--I have a foot doctor appt. to see if he can help my knees, I need to organize and pack, and head out to Northampton for the evening. The airport shuttle picks me up at 5:45 (bleeeeeh) Tuesday morning. I come home at 1 AM (blllllllleeeeeeeehhhhhh) on the morning of the 26th. I'll bring photos!

Venturing into the Unknown

2008-05-19T20:10:00.000-07:00

After 3 years of writing in the Big Yellow House, I'm really venturing into fiction...and the unknown. I've written 2 parts of a story and I'm not sure where it's going. It's exciting, and intimidating...but I'm safe in that room and so, I write. This is FUN!
*************************************************************
PART 1

She glanced one last time in the rearview mirror, taking a mental photograph of the white lighthouse as it disappeared from view. She heard a whine from the backseat.

"It's OK, Sadie. It's OK."

She turned up the radio and Bruce Springsteen's voice mingled with the sea air. "It's going to be OK," she repeated.

She drove down the main street of town, not daring to look out the window for fear she'd catch someone's eye, and slid into the left lane to turn for the highway, but changed her mind and jerked the car to the right, toward the water.

Hopping out of the car, she grabbed her camera bag from the backseat. She wanted to take Sadie with her, but she know that her canine companion would want to play in the surf. That was not an option. Pulling her Yankee cap down further over her eyes, she jogged to the boardwalk and snapped a few photos of the rickety, weathered wood, the boardwalk ice cream shop, the turned down lifeguard chairs lying in the sand, and the waves. Her legs ached to dip into the water, but she knew she couldn't. After turning for a last long shot of the lighthouse, blurry through her tears, she ran back to the car, wiping her eyes, and pulled out onto the street. She pointing her jeep towards the highway, closed the windows and flipped on the AC--she didn't want to smell the salt and sand anymore.

* * * * * * * *
PART 2 (You should know that our prompt/challenge was to use these 5 objects in our story: stringless guitar, pizza cutter, duffel bag, Bible, bonzai tree.)

By the time she hit the Jersey Turnpike, the Bruce Springsteen CD had played through. She reached into the pile of CDs next to her and grabbed one, trading it for Bruce without even looking. The unmistakable low strings of Crooked Still filled the car--this would work. Her phone buzzed in the cupholder beside her. She ignored it and kept driving. Ten minutes later, it rang again. She ignored it and turned up the music.

As she approached the Delaware Memorial Bridge, she realized she hadn't eaten since lunchtime yesterday. She pulled off the highway into the Clara Barton Rest Stop. Opening the trunk, she pushed aside her sad, stringless guitar. A year and a half ago, just a few weeks after bringing Sadie home, she'd been upstairs when she hear the horrible crash of her guitar hitting the floor, strings vibrating painfully. The sound itself scared Sadie away before she could do any permanent damage. She'd found the puppy backed int a corner, growling at the fallen guitar with 4 snapped strings. Though she'd never gotten around to restringing it, she'd tossed it in the car at the last minute--maybe she'd string it on this trip. She pulled Sadie's red leash out of one of the duffel bags jammed in the trunk.

"C'mon, girl," she said. She let Sadie stretch her legs for a few minuts before leading her back to the car. "I'll be right back, " she said, rubbing the dog behind her golden ears and checking the travel bowl to make sure there was still water inside before shutting the door and jogging inside.

About half an hour into the drive, she'd realized she was squinting--and that her sunglasses were back on the kitchen table. Just inside the doors, under a sign that read "Clara Barton Rest Stop. Welcome to the Garden State," was a cart covered in sunglasses. She plucked a pair of plastic $18 shades and set them down next to the register, in front of a tiny bonzai tree, handing the man a $20.

She turned and looked around the entryway at her options and settled on pizza. There was a bit of a line and she found herself staring blankly at the teenaged boy rolling the pizza cutter methodically over one pizza, then another and another.

"Ex-cuse me, ma'am." She looked up at the teenage girl rolling her eyes, "Can I help you?"

"Two cheese slices to go, a water and an iced tea, please"

She opened her wallet to hand the cashier money and realizing she only had 2 singles, pulled out her ATM card instead. The cashier smiled at her from behind big, round glasses and looked quickly at her card. "Thank you, C-Carries?"

She smiled. "It's Karis. Thanks," and took back her card.

"Karis? What is that?"

"It's Greek. Have a good one."

She walked back to the car shaking her head. Her father had wanted to name her Grace, but that was too plain and ordinary for her mother. They had settled on Karis, which meant grace in Greek, thereby honoring her father's idea and her mother's heritage. They thought it was perfect, but they didn't have to go through life spelling and pronouncing it for everyone.

When she got back to the car, she set her pizza on the passenger seat and stuck the drinks in the cupholders. She moved the cellphone, noting that she now had 4 missed calls, all from the same number. She tore off a piece of pizza crust and gave it to Sadie. It was the least she could do--the poor dog hated car rides.

An hour later, as she approached Baltimore, the phone rang again. Looking at the number, she flipped it open, taking a deep breath.

"Hi."

"Hi? Karis, I've been calling for hours. What the f - "

"I can't. Annie, I'm sorry, but I can't right now."

"Are you OK?"

"Please, An, I'll call you when I get there. Maybe I'll be able to explain. Please?"

"Alright. Be careful. Keep your phone charged. Lock your doors. Pull off if you get tired. ... I love you."

"Promise. I love you too."

She closed the phone and threw it on the floor of the backseat. It was time to switch CDs again.

She drove all night, with Billy Joel, Simon and Garfunkel, the Beatles and Carole King as her soundtrack. She stopped every few hours to let Sadie out and grab a drink or a snack. In Tennessee, she'd been accosted by a Bible salesman, reminding her that she was a sinner.

"Jesus saves!" he cried.

Sadie growled. The man followed Karis to her car, quoting from Scripture. Finally, she turned to face him.

"I'm Catholic," she said.

He stopped in his tracks. "Oh."

T13

2008-05-15T20:38:00.000-07:00

1) I think I have an allergy issue. I was dizzy earlier this week. About this time last year, I had dizzy spells and it turned out to be fluid in my ears. I've been taking allergy meds and the heavy head is better.

2) I started triathlon training yesterday. 9 weeks from Sunday, I'll compete in the Falmouth Tri.

3) N and I went to see Tracy Grammer and Jim Henry at the Iron Horse last weekend. I always forget how much I love TG--her songs, her stories, her humor. It made me very excited for FRFF.

4) I booked my flight to L.A. this week. 9 days in June--I'm excited.

5) Even with missing 7 work days for L.A., I have 3 days to take before June 30!

6) I made an appointment with a podiatrist today. They want to x-ray my feet and were surprised to hear me say I've had many an x-ray of my foot. I don't think they are expecting a web-footed girl with scars from toe amputation, do you?

7) My cell phone is no longer holding a charge. It makes me very sad. I really don't want to spend money on a stinking new battery.

8) On a lunch errand today, I ran into one of my ball players and her mom. The mom needed a full 30 seconds to recognize me since I wasn't in shorts and a t-shirt.

9) I'm going home in a few weeks to be my parents' daughter's Confirmation sponsor. Katie and I have the same birthday--she was my 14th birthday present! I can't quite believe that the tiny infant I used to babysit is 15 years old!!

10) In the last few weeks, my email box has brought me many an email from my dearest darling Big Yellow friends--on an almost daily basis. This makes me exceedingly happy. And grateful.

11) This is a very busy time at work...someone joked recently that there isn't any truly "quiet" time. I tried to contradict her, but...well, she's right. Thankfully, I really do enjoy my job and I find the new responsibilities challenging. Even if I do daydream about 7 year olds.

12) I got a new print that I need to have framed. It has a watercolor of a bicycle and reads, "It has something to do with giving back while moving forward."

13) I am the 4th of 24 in my generation of cousins. Our parents' efforts to get us all together as children has paid off. We're friends. We enjoy one another's company. We get together just because, with our parents and without our parents. It's such a gift that our parents gave us.

Friends

2008-05-06T19:54:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, I spent yet another fantastic 3 days with some of my most favorite people in all the world. We sang, ate, drank, danced, laughed and listened. On Friday night, we found our seats in a familiar dark corner room at our bar of choice, quizzing each other about state birds and celebrating TWO babies to arrive in November. On Saturday night, we all sat around in a cozy yellow living room and sang great songs and silly songs late into the night. Sunday afternoon, we didn't want it to end and ate slowly at Tokyo and Taipei, sharing pictures and quiet stories. We hugged and waved as we walked out of sight, promising we'd be in touch. That night, a flurry of emails flooded our inboxes as we relived the weekend and started our countdown til January.

For most of us, our reunion happened much sooner than we anticipated...and much sooner than we would have liked. Our friend, the always witty, perfectly sarcastic and compassionate Andrea Coller, died last Wednesday night after a long battle with cancer. I couldn't quite wrap my mind around it when I heard the news--I closed my eyes and heard her voice in my ear, reading her story...and I heard our laughter in gales in response to her straight-forward storytelling. I didn't know Andrea well--but we've been on several writing retreats together now and in that familiar living room in a big yellow house, strong bonds formed even if we didn't talk for 6 months at a time. I consider myself lucky to count Andrea among my friends...but I was also a fan--of her writing, her music, her fashion and her one-of-a-kind personality.

About a year ago, Andrea began an essay on our retreat. I remember laughing so hard my face hurt while falling deeply in love with her writing. She submitted that piece to a contest for Glamour magazine...and out of thousands of entries, hers won. She was surprised. We, her writing companions, were not. The piece embodied brilliance. Last weekend, Andrea talked about how excited she was to see the article in print--and to get the feedback from the judges. Even though the magazine hit the newsstands over a week early, Andrea missed it. So we're celebrating it for (and with) her. Go buy the lovely Glamour with a botoxed Jessica Simpson on the cover. Open it to page 150. Or simply go here:

"I Want My Life Back"
Interview with Andrea

(And for that feedback Andrea wanted to read, you can go here and scroll about 2/3 of the way down to read judge Jennifer Weiner's thoughts on Andrea and the piece. Thanks, Matt.)

Andrea's funeral was on Monday. A group of us from retreat gathered in Northampton on Sunday to be together, remember Andrea and celebrate our friendships. I can't help but think Andrea was smiling down on us as we sang music she loved and splashed around in the hot tub. At the service, I looked to my left and my right and saw people for whom I am especially grateful. They make me laugh, they let me cry, they listen and they accept with open arms and hearts. We're lucky to have each other--and we were lucky to have Andrea. When January finally comes, we'll be popping TicTacs and drinking 007s...and we'll try to be as funny and as honest as she always was.

Enough said, sha la la la la la la la la la...

One word

2008-04-06T16:49:00.000-07:00

1. Where is your cell phone? table
2. Your significant other? ha
3. Your hair? annoying
4. Your mother? brilliant
5. Your father? determined
6. Your favorite thing? kids
7. Your dream last night? blank
8. Your favorite drink? coke
9. Your dream/goal? children
10. The room you're in? disaster
11. Your ex? crazy
12. Your fear? alone
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? home
14. Where were you last night? Lost
15. What you're not? patient
16. Muffins? nah
17. One of your wish list items? Africa
18. Where you grew up? Jersey
19. The last thing you did? drink
20. What are you wearing? pjs
21. Your TV? basketball
22. Your pets? none
23. Your computer? shiny
24. Your life? content
25. Your mood? cozy
26. Missing someone? yes
27 Your car? reliable
28. Something you're not wearing? bra
29 Favorite Store? lovely
30. Your summer? fun!
31. Like someone? indeed
32. Your favorite color? blue
33. When is the last time you laughed? play
34. Last time you cried? sweet

Schuyler's Monster

2008-03-08T11:42:00.000-08:00

Last week, I read every night before bed, then forced myself to put the book down and go to sleep. I could have read it all in one sitting, but I wanted to enjoy it...I didn't want the story to end.

The book is Schuyler's Monster by Robert Rummel-Hudson. I've been reading Rob's blog for about three years now, and while I enjoy his writing a great deal, it will surprise none of you that it was his daughter, Schuyler, who captured my interest and a piece of my heart. Rob manages to write about Schuyler in a way that doesn't shine a spotlight on her, but instead reflects the light that eminates from inside her--through a crooked, broad smile and huge, sparkling eyes.

I was excited to finally have my hands on this book, but I knew I was in trouble when I started crying while reading the acknowledgments. Rob's writing has the ability to make me laugh out loud, but many times I have read his words with tears sliding down my cheeks. Life has not been gentle with Schuyler, but she has a rough and tumble spirit that will not be contained.

The book chronicles Rob's journey as a father...from the first days of diapers and jaundice, through the questions around why Schuyler wouldn't, or couldn't, speak, and all the way to Plano, TX, and a group of people who embrace, celebrate and revel in his daughter's unique being. As Schuyler grows and learns to look her monster in the eye, Rob is there, sword in hand, to fight right along with her.

I planned to be more articulate about this book, but I'm having trouble putting it all into words. Go buy the book...then go read the blog--and even more importantly, go look at the pictures on flickr. I dare you to resist Schuyler.

***************************************************

In other news...look what arrived last week!

4 things...(a different kind of T13)

2008-02-14T12:18:00.001-08:00

A friend sent me this one...feel free to take it to your own blog and fill in the blanks!

Four jobs I have had in my life...
1. bus girl/hostess/foodrunner at a local pub
2. nanny
3. teacher
4. writer

Four movies I would watch over and over (no matter if they are on crappy TV and cut up): (Not in any order)
1. A League of Their Own
2. When Harry Met Sally
3. Juno
4. Silence of the Lambs

Four places I have lived:
1. New York
2. New Jersey
3. Massachusetts
4. California

Four TV Shows that I watch (right now):
1. Lost
2. Survivor
3. American Idol (I know, I know, but my friends at work watch it and if I don't, I'm left out of the lunch conversation!)
4. Grey's Anatomy

Four places I have been (that i love):
1. Cape Cod
2. Outer Banks of NC
3. Ireland
4. Eastern Shore of MD

Four People who e-mail me (regularly):
1. Melissa :)
2. Anne
3. Whitney
4. Dennise (she does our "death notices" at work!!)

Four favorite things to eat:
1. Crab
2. Lasagna
3. Ice Cream (let's face it, this is #1)
4. clam chowder

Four places I would rather be right now:
1. beach
2. Ireland
3. South Africa
4. ski slopes

Four things I am looking forward to this year:
1. BY retreat in April
2. Trip to CA in June
3. The possibility of my cousins moving to NY from London
4. Central Park Triathlon

Happy 2008!

2007-12-31T21:04:00.000-08:00

It's the New Year. I am back cozy in my apartment to see the NYC ball drop with N. We were out in Northampton for First Night festivities and lunch with our beloved kj. We caught half a set of the girls' kids' show, then headed to BY for a couple of hours with my favorite toddler on the planet. It had been six weeks (or more?) since I'd gotten my grins and squeals. It ended 2007 on a good note. We caught the girls' "grown up" sets, grabbed dinner, then realized we had over 2 hours til the Noho ball drop. And if we left, we could avoid the crazy after-midnight drivers. So, we waved to the ball as we sloshed through the street and climbed in the car to drive home.

2008 will be a great year, my friends. 2007 has sucked for so many people I love dearly...I am convinced that '08 will right the ship and we'll float in the right directions.

I'm ripping off our dear M.

1 -- My favorite movie of the year...I just love Harry Potter, even if the movies serve as wonderkillers. The kids are brilliant, and I focus on the positive. N tells me that Juno would top the list if I'd managed to make it to the theater last week.

2 -- Favorite books of the year: variation on a theme: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.

3 -- Surprise of the year -- I have a new job! Didn't see the change coming, but I think it's going to be wonderful. I also went on 2 non-BY retreats--one with college students and one with high-schoolers and am contemplating a new career path!

4 -- Best vacation -- we have a tie. Miami for my cousin's graduation was wonderful--5 days filled with family, including my cousins from London (who are 4 and 2). Running between the pool and the beach and just being able to relax with them for a few days was just joyful. Lake Winnipesaukee must top the list as well, though! I didn't realize I could like a lake that much!! I look forward to our next trip and already know what board game I'll be bringing to entertain us.

5 -- Struggle of the year ... IdiotBoy at work...it was a short, but mighty struggle. I also struggled with how to stand up for myself in that situation--I'm not very good at it!

6 -- Sorrow of the year -- I've watched some friends go through hard times and stood beside them as they faced the sadness.

7 -- Joy of the year ... spending good, quality time with the people I love most in this world: my family, my good friends, colleagues I've grown to adore. I think I treasure those moments and hours more than I ever have.

8 -- Moment I wish I could do over ... I don't really let myself have those!

9 -- Best musical moment -- There have been many...I can't go without mentioning the hours under the FRFF sun and stars, but I agree with M as well--those BY hootenannies are just magical and so very special.

10 -- Best writing moment -- I don't know if I have one. I do know that after some sessions at BY I think to myself "That's EXACTLY how I wanted it to sound."

11 -- Favorite CD of the year -- Sister Holler, hands down. I think the album is especially special because I heard so many of them as "newborn" songs.

12 -- Big Grateful Warmth award goes to ... BY buddies! Seriously, what I love is that my time with you is not restricted to 48 hours in Northampton. I rang in 2007 in Philly with A, G, N and GJ and I ended 2007 with kj, the BY residents and N. We've gone to concerts , out to dinner, swam in the lake, camped together at FR, attended Yart parties, seen thousands of Santas on the steet, and enjoyed endless emails, phone calls and hours in each other's company. What an amazing gift we've been given!! I can't wait to see you all again soon.

13-- Friends ... I am a very very very lucky girl. My friends are some of the most amazing human beings that walk this wonderful planet and not a day goes by when I am not reminded of this. Most days, though, I feel particularly lucky to have wonderful friends at work who fill the mundane-ness with smiles.

Peace, joy, love and laughter to you all.

Thursday 13

2007-12-20T21:01:00.001-08:00

1. I go home tomorrow! For 5 days. Then I return to MA for 6 days (and hit up First Night Northampton with fumblerette). Then I drive to NJ (I think) to fly to Iowa with my mom, meet up with our cousins and volunteer at the Iowa Caucus.

2. I believed in Santa for a long time. Wait, I still believe in Santa. But I believed Santa was a real live person living on the North Pole until I was about 10...which is relatively late, I think. This is because every year on Christmas Eve, my mother's uncle would call all of the cousins in my generation--but we didn't know it was Uncle Ed. It was Santa--complete with Mrs. Claus and jingling bells in the background (thanks, Aunt Nancy!). Uncle Ed called our parents in the days before Christmas Eve--he knew what we wanted, what we were getting, etc. It was the best and I'm hoping one of my uncles eventually picks up the tradition.

3. T was visiting NYC and asked if I'd consider meeting up with her to attend the Nields show a few weekends ago. I gladly agreed. T took the train to my hometown where I picked her up and she stayed with my family for the weekend. We had an awesome time in NYC--great show. But something stole N&K's thunder. Santacon: HUNDREDS of people dressed as Santa!! Even at the pizza joint we picked for dinner:

4. T also made me hand warmers!! That I *l0ve* because you can write and type with them on:

5. I have been home SO little in the last 7 weeks that I didn't get a tree :( T saw my tree at home in NJ--and had a few laughs at my father's resistance to a tree entering the house at ALL. I did however get a real wreath and every once in a while, I get a waft of pine. I also put up lights.

6. Basketball has started again. We won our first game by 4 points. I yelled myself hoarse. Our 2nd game was cancelled--we don't play again until 2008. I loved our girls last year. I still love our 8th graders. But a few of these 7th graders are so adorable, I want to take them home!

7. I've had 2 baby showers in the last month or so. I give books. Though I could walk into Carters and buy everything in the place. That's why I stick to bookstores. I know what my favorites are and I get those.

8. On my most recent trip to the children's section, I found this book. And bought it for myself as it was about $3. It was a favorite of mine and I hadn't seen it in years. I do plan to need it eventually.

9. We have a stinkin' department luncheon for work tomorrow. Almost 40 minutes from work! The really crappy part is that our VP will expect us to return to our desks after lunch. To be honest, I'd rather spend the Friday before Christmas with the 2 or 3 people in my department I really enjoy, instead of all of us pretending to be one happy family!

10. I'm loving the new job. The writing is a challenge all day every day, but I think I'll settle in. I adore Father (pres. of college), and I am loving getting to spend some time with him and learning more about him.

11. I miss BY. I took the winter session off, which was a wise decision given the amount of snow we've been buried under for a week! But I miss my spot on the rug and I miss my writing buddies. My Monday group isn't as awesome as our retreat group, but I still love them and I feel like I'm missing out on huge chunks of their lives and stories!

12. You would think making mix cds would be easy and fun, right? For me, it's just stressful. Which songs do I pick? Will the person love them as much as I do? What is a good balance? What is a good ratio of Guster to Nields, Joel and Springsteen to Crooked Still and Tracy Grammer? How should I order the songs? These decisions truly cause me agida.

13. I am not packed for tomorrow. This is not good as I need to be packed before I leave my house at 8:30. That proably means I should stop blogging, right?

Check-in

2007-11-30T09:40:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry. It's been a while...all 5 of you who read this blog!

Life has been crazy--the weekend before Thanksgiving, I helped out on a retreat for the College--50 18-22 year olds. I had a blast, though I'd lost my voice COMPLETELY 2 days before I was supposed to go, so that made things interesting. The weekend was wonderful...then it was back for 2 days at the office before Thanksgiving break. I had a wonderful time in NJ!

Today, I'm off to help out on a retreat for 60 (SIXTY!!!) high school students. What was I thinking?! Before I go, I need to get some work done and run a few errands on the way to the retreat. It's going to be FREEZING in New Hampshire this weekend.

I hope you all are well! I miss you and I'll share more musings and nuttiness next week.

Thursday 13 (a day early...)

2007-11-14T15:36:00.000-08:00

Inspired by M...here is my Thursday 13---odds and ends of the apartment.

Just FYI, I am currently voice-less. I've had a cold and last night at about 7 o'clock, I said something outloud to myself (a frequent happening) and my voice was GONE. I haven't said much of anything today and still, it's pretty dead.

OK, on to the 13...

1. My fridge...adorned with a) the "welcome" message board that the apartment complex gifts to us upon arrival; b) 2 magnets purchased at kj and jb's yart party; c) a card from my friend Joyce being held by a "road not taken" magnet; d) the "thank you and congrats" card from HC for reaching 53.2% participation; e) a card with one of my favorite lines from Desiderata; f) my friend Mere's address held on by yet another good-quote-on-a-magnet; g) notepad.

2. When it's on sale at CVS, I take advantage. Yes, I know Coca-Cola company is evil, but...well, I don't drink coffee and I need caffeine.

3. My bike. Triathlon # still attached under the seat. It's pretty and blue...though I haven't spoken to it in months.

4. Fancy bag...I bought it on Saturday morning for my work dinner on Saturday night. 2 black ties a year and I usually just bring my normal, huge, un-fancy bag and shove it under the table!

5. My living room window...about 6 feet tall. The pictures on the windowsill are a) my siblings and I at my First Communion; b) my CA "siblings" and I on their front lawn; c) my sister, my parents' goddaughter and I at my bro's high school graduation party; d) my mom, her sisters and my grandparents in the late '60s.

6. A poster that needs to be framed and hung. My beloved Manhattan...subway routes.

7. Tokens from college retreats--the retreat I am helping to lead this weekend. I have to give a talk (please let me get my voice back) and choose 2 songs to go with that talk. The retreats were on the Cape--can't wait to get back there.

8. My anthem...lyrics and illustrations by Nerissa and Katryna Nields. I love this.

9. Candles, candlesticks and snuff from Colonial Williamsburg. They're a housewarming gift from my mother's cousin--the one I lived with in DC. I love them...now I need to have some people over for dinner to burn the candles!

10. Notecards. I love to send and receive cards. I was REALLY good about it in college and always have a big supply of cards--I just send them less frequently now. Darn age of the internet!

11. My washer/dryer and ironing board. The iron and ironing board are rarely put away since I iron EVERYTHING everyday. I love to iron. I also love having a w/d in my apartment. Hard to beat.

12. A Hundred Thousand Welcomes to you. This hangs just inside my front door, over the entry to the kitchen. I bought it at a fair in Los Angeles and it's been with me ever since.

13. My West Wing dvd collection. Awesome show and I've gotten fumblerette hooked on it. I know GJ is hooked as well. I miss not having new episodes, but I'm also grateful for tv on dvd!

Another weekend at the BY

2007-10-28T19:47:00.000-07:00

I've sat in that living room more times than I can count, on the same piece of carpet...I swear the door jamb has molded to my back a little. There, I am surrounded by people and things that have become familiar and safe. The clicking of keys, the tapping of feet, the call of the loon clock, the sipping of tea, the strumming of strings and the squealing of a happy girl provide the soundtrack of the house.

I had another weekend in Northampton--a weekend spent with some of my very favorite people in the world. I have the privilege of gathering with them and listening to their brilliant writing, their songs that make me close my eyes and disappear into the chords, and their humor during late night "board meetings" at Packard's.

As M said, long live the Merchants of Death!

Warm and Fuzzy...

2007-10-24T12:21:00.000-07:00

As he was falling asleep last night, my friend and colleague's 6 year old son said,

"I love Kris McLastName. Maybe she can come and babysit for us again soon."

What's better than that?!

Friday Fourteen

2007-10-19T18:04:00.000-07:00

It's Saturday now, but the principle holds.

1. I plan to make apple crisp and crab cakes this weekend. So much yum.

2. My favorite children's book in the world is Wilfrid Gordon McDonald Partridge by Mem Fox. It sometimes makes me cry, but it is just so good.

3. Last weekend, I was reminded of just how much I love the American Girl books...my favorite was always Kirsten. There were only 3 options when I was a kid...and Kirsten was from the era of my hero, Laura Ingalls Wilder, so she won. Molly was cool too, but Samantha was far too much of a girly girl.

4. To this day, if I catch a repeat of Little House on the Prairie on television, I can pretty much identify the plot within 5 minutes. It was possibly my very favorite show as a kid.

5. I will be coaching my 7th and 8th grade basketball team again this year. I'm really excited to get back to it, even though I think we'll *really* stink up the joint this year.

6. I am proud of Joe Torre. He's a classy guy.

7. On my next trip home, I may not recognize my own home. After 20 years in the house, my parents are done paying tuition--so they have refinished the hardwood floors, torn up the tile in the foyer/kitchen/downstairs bathroom and laid hardwoods, taken the wallpaper down in the kitchen and renovated the kitchen. I'm looking forward to seeing it, especially since I haven't had to deal with not having a kitchen.

8. My mom is a chapter or 2 away from completing her dissertation and Ed.D. program! She's wildly smart.

9. Growing up, my grandmother (dad's mom) and my uncle (dad's oldest brother) came on just about every vacation with us. They'd meet us in Westchester County, NY or at our house and my sister and I would climb into their car to avoid spending a car trip with our younger brother. We'd spend two weeks at the beach, with early mornings and evenings spent snuggled in Grandma's bed watching old episodes of Matlock or Murder, She Wrote. I'm so grateful to have so many memories of those vacations now.

10. My parents' families get along really well. This might explain why my dad's youngest brother and my mom's younger sister are engaged. Growing up, we hosted almost every holiday with both sides of the family--and even when someone else hosted, everyone from both sides was invited. We never had to split holidays. I didn't realize how unusual this was until high school.

11. When I started college, getting dressed in the morning was a challenge. I'd spent the last 12 years in uniforms--and when I wasn't in my uniform plaid, I was in soccer/basketball/softball/swimming clothes. The idea that I had to put outfits together every day was irritating. I still wish I had a uniform even today!

12. After an insane week at work (just google my college and click the "news" filter at the top), I hit the on campus pub with some colleagues for a couple of hours after work. We all shared our "best" phone calls/letters from the week.

13. Over the weekend or next week, I'll post something I wrote about dreams--I had a dream last week that the lights in my apartment weren't working. A friend who is into dream symbolism said it might mean that I feel like I'm "in the dark." Someone hit the nail on the head!

14. I have 3 retreats in the next 7 weekends. The first is our BY retreat...some of my favorite people in the world gathered in a cozy Victorian for almost 48 hours--plus, fall in the Pioneer Valley. The second is a retreat with the College--I'm going as a leader and apparently need to give a talk--topic to be determined. This retreat was one of my favorites as a student and I'm looking forward to getting to know some kids, since I don't get to interact much in my job. The third is a high school retreat. 65 teenagers in cabins in NH for the weekend--nothing can POSSIBLY go wrong, right??

Where's Waldo?

2007-10-02T20:01:00.000-07:00

Hint...I'm pretty easy to find.

This day...

2007-09-11T18:53:00.000-07:00

I'm apologizing in advance for the scatteredness of this post.

I'm not sure why this year kicked me in the gut, but it did. I woke up this morning unaware, not remembering what this day means. The sky was grey and rain poured down from the heavens--so different from that crystal clear day 6 years ago. I still remember hearing Katie Couric's voice coming from the living room of my apartment in L.A. I remember coming out and seeing the images of the buildings on fire--and trying to figure out why they were showing footage from 1993. Then, I realized the smoke was coming from much higher up. My mind started racing.

The first building fell on my drive to work. I was on the phone with my aunt, trying to figure out what the hell was going on...but there were no answers. I walked into the teacher's room just before the north tower fell--the 3rd grade teacher saw my face and reached out to turn off the television. I stopped him. I had to watch. I had to see it happen--because it didn't seem real. Seconds later, it was all gone.

I've never been to the Statue of Liberty; I've never been to the top of the Empire State Building; I've spent limited time in Central Park. When you grow up going in and out of Manhattan on a weekly or monthly basis, you take all of it for granted. But I'd been to the top of the World Trade Center. I'm not sure why we decided to go up that day...my father took the train into the WTC every day, and when we would spend a day at his office, we took the train in there too. I can still remember the feeling of looking up and having those towers block out the sun.

The highest point in Bergen County is less than a mile from my house in NJ. From there, you can see the entire New York skyline. It's how my sister realized that something was terribly wrong that day--she saw smoke billowing from the silhouettes. Every time I go home, I can only see the hole in that skyline. Today, my father and my little brother take the train into the pit where the World Trade Center once stood. A daily reminder...

Today, though, I found myself thinking about the people. I thought about Mr. Gregory and his booming voice...I went to school with his kids and even babysat for them a few times. Mrs. Gregory was teaching with my mother that morning.

I thought about Pat Hoey. I never met him, but his sister is one of my mother's best friends. I grew up with his nieces. I think of him every time I drive over the George Washington Bridge, his bridge, his pride and joy (well, after his wife and kids!). Pat Hoey was responsible for lighting the bridge from the inside...and for the HUGE flag that flies on holidays.

That's this day.

reflection

2007-09-01T18:00:00.000-07:00

I wrote this on my last summer Monday in BY.
*************************************************************************************

I'd met him only once, briefly, in church. His face was serene, kind and warmly familiar. I didn't see him again until today, as he lay quietly, finally at peace. It seems strange that I didn't know him--but then, as I looked up and saw his face reflected in his children, in his spectacular daughter whom I am lucky enough to call a friend, I realized that I had come to know the very best of him.

This sweet, compassionate, fierce and wildly intelligent man is not a stranger. I know about the tennis tournament he hosted in his backyard every summer. I know that 60 years ago, he went to class in the building where I work every day. I know that each Sunday for 40 some years, you could find him in the 4th pew of the small Catholic church in the center of town. I know that even as his memory faded and cruelly slipped away, he continued to exude the same gentleness, love and humor that had defined him for almost 80 years. I know that six weeks ago, his youngest son brought a new baby--the 30th grandchild--to meet his grandfather. He lay the baby gently in his father's arms, preparing to help him as you would help a toddler. But those arms, arms that didn't remember how to work or write or eat, eased into the cradled position that had held his own 10 children and 29 grandchildren before this.

There aer some things that simply cannot be stripped away.

Ahem...

2007-08-29T20:36:00.000-07:00

Your attention please...

Mariano Rivera is the man.

Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.

Friday's Feast

2007-08-24T14:11:00.000-07:00

2 posts in 2 days. Be impressed.

Appetizer
Say there’s a book written about your life. Who would you want to narrate the audio version?
**Allison Janney, please

Soup
Take the letters from your favorite kind of nut and write a sentence. (Example: Perhaps every avenue needs understanding today.)
**People each admire nothing under turtles.

Salad
If you could go back in time and spend one week in another decade, which decade would you choose?
**The 1870s...with Laura Ingalls!

Main Course
Name a song that brings back memories for you.
**The Sweetness

Dessert
Do you prefer to wash your hands in cold water or warm water?
**Warm

Friday's Feast

Thursday 13

2007-08-23T20:52:00.000-07:00

1. 10 years ago, I was preparing to go off to college. I'll stand on the big field at the top of the hill on Saturday welcome the Class of 2011, watching them say goodbye to their parents and hello to their new family. Never thought I'd be here 10 years later.

2. There's a new job thing that is interesting (and stressful to contemplate), but it may be a non-decision by tomorrow.

3. I am going down to the Jersey Shore next weekend because I am dying to get knocked around by some big waves.

4. My triathlon (well, now it's 2 of 3 events...) training has slowed down a bit, but now I have 16 days and I need to pick it up a bit again. The whole open water swimming thing is much more daunting than I anticipated.

5. I bought 2 magnets and jb and kj's Yart party. I just put them on the refrigerator tonight and they make me quite happy. They were made by little girls named Lindsay and Taylor.

6. In the last 3.5 weeks, I have listened to Sister Holler almost exclusively--at work, at home, in the car. It makes me quite happy.

7. When I was a kid, we'd go to my dad's office a couple times a year. We'd get on the train, transfer to the PATH in Hoboken and get out in the belly of the World Trade Center. When I go home, I can see the NYC skyline from the highway. It still kicks me in the gut every time.

8. I have 3 free weekends between now and December 1. It's going to be a hell of a fall. Work will be insane too, which will make for a chaotic, dizzy girl.

9. I prefer to drive at night. Leaving somewhere at 10 PM and driving til 12:30 or 1 AM doesn't bother me at all. I switch on some music or the Yankee game and I'm all set.

10. I *hate* feeling helpless. I can't stand watching my friends hurt and knowing there's nothing I can do about it--except offer an ear and a shoulder. For the last year and a bit, a good friend of mine has struggled and I held her through many tears. But when the phone rang, and there was actually something concrete I could do, well, it didn't just help her, it helped me. To feel useful and helpful and valuable is just one of those things I need.

11. My middle name is Ferris. I hated it as a kid (getting called Bueller and Ferris Wheel wasn't really fun), but I love it now. It's my Nana's maiden name (mom's mom). I share the middle name with half a dozen cousins at least--my great-grandparents had 4 daughters, so this is the only way to keep that name alive. And the family is big and extraordinarily close--I'm so proud to carry the name. My poor first child will have to bear the burden as well, but hopefully he or she will come to appreciate it as much as I do.

12. My apartment could use a good once over. Maybe Saturday before I go to work.

13. I am so overwhelmed lately, by work and life and the sheer amount of stuff in front of me, that I have a hard time putting my head down and being productive. I really need to change that! Which means, I should post this, turn off the computer and go to bed!

Between vacations

2007-08-14T20:33:00.000-07:00

Lost to Winnipesaukee:
One pair of sunglasses
One pair of goggles (so so sad)
Skin off my feet, knees and fingers

Gained from Winnipesaukee:
Some new freckles
A new flotation device for Matt and Rachel
Many a full stomach

What a weekend. First, there was the wonderful Yart party at kj's...then a delightfully enjoyable evening at Club Passim. But the 3 days at Winnipesaukee were the icing, cherries and a la mode of it all.

I've always been an ocean girl. Pools are fine, and necessary. Lakes are gross and slimy. Oceans are fabulous--rough, salty, spectacular and wonderful. But Lake Winni and the view from the cabin have converted me--I like lakes now. They're no ocean, but wow. I had a great few days and I've returned to MA bruised, scraped and scratched, but blissfully happy. The traffic on the drive home wasn't even that bad.

2 days of work and I'm off to the Cape! I love summer.

Big Yellow Magic

2007-08-10T18:07:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow morning, our dear fumblerette is picking me up at about 11 AM. We're heading an hour west to Northampton to spend a few hours at the Yart Party at kj & jb's. Then, we'll drive back east, stopping to pick up my car, then stopping to drop of fumblerette's car. We'll then head to Cambridge and Club Passim to continue the "yay, fumblerette lives in MA, let's hear folk music" tour with Nerissa and Katryna's show. After that, we will drive to Lake Winnipesaukee to visit Matt and Rachel at their house there. WOOHOO!! A few days of *nothing* but friends, swimming, biking, kayaking and reading.

I sat on the floor of the living room in Big Yellow on Monday night, playing with Miss Lila while she sat on her mom's lap, envisioning many of my BY friends together again in just over 2 months. How wonderful to be spending a weekend with friends that I met in that sacred, magical space. How lucky am I??

FRFF 07 in review

2007-08-02T18:41:00.000-07:00

My computer is dying, folks. I hope this works. I bought a new one tonight (WTF was I thinking? Gonna be fun to pay that off!), so things should be better soon. But I simply couldn't wait any longer to comment on the wonderful weekend in Hillsdale.

So, this marked my fifth Falcon Ridge weekend. For the first 2 years, I camped with a huge group--college friends, their siblings, their siblings' friends. It was insane, but a ton of fun too. My first year, the only name I recognized in the line-up was Dar Williams (well, Arlo too, but he doesn't *really* count). I'd never heard of Eddie from Ohio, Vance Gilbert, Tracy Grammer or Nerissa and Katryna Nields. I remember being overwhelmed by the quality of music and the community that surrounded me. When people say, "We're home!" as they drive onto the fields of Falcon Ridge, they aren't lying. It's home.

This year, I camped with my best friend (who started coming to FR 2 summers ago after I dragged her to a Nields show in western MA), a friend from DC (and her friend) and my beloved BY friends. How wonderful to see ~j and really spend some time with her and her CurlyGirl. And our dear ~N~ who is a neighbor now, just down the road in Boston, and her friend Rhi. It was a wonderful camp--relaxed, laid back, put together (thanks to ~j and CG!), and tons of fun. We were extraordinarily lucky to have ~j offer us spots on her workshop stage tent, and to have the likes of ~N~, t and A to secure us great spots in the mainstage tarp run.

It's so hard to come up with hilights of the weekend...Tracy Grammer blows me away. She seems to grow more confident by the year, and each year at FR, I leave saying, "I'd forgotten how much I adore her music and her presence." Eddie from Ohio makes me laugh (CARP!)--the boys double Julie over and it's just a joy. Finding out that Dar and Gandalf are neighbors and occassionally hang out and jam was a little disturbing, but somehow appropriate! Dar lit up the hillside with "Iowa" as always...this time, she brought young Stephen out to witness the magic of FR. New discoveries this year include Red Molly and Ellis...and also, a first-time appreciation for the Kennedys and Chris Thompson as part of the Stragelings. We commented several times over the course of the weekend that mainstage at FR seems to turn people into 7 year olds...Julie bounced around and giggled like a kid, Dar was positively electric, Nerissa (when she joined Dar for a few tunes) never stopped moving and never stopped grinning.

Then, there is the fact that finally (FINALLY) I have songs like "This Train," "Soldier at the Door," and my beloved "Eloise" on cd. Seriously, folks, it's their best album yet. The girls were wonderful all weekend long.

That was disorganized and rambly, but I am still processing the awesomeness of the weekend.

13 days and counting...

2007-07-13T20:23:00.000-07:00

...until the Joy of Joys, the Festival of Festivals, our Falcon Ridge. In the spirit of kj's vacation toolbox, here are my bare essentials for 4 days of sunshine, fire and rain:

sunscreen (LOTS of sunscreen)
headlamp (late night trips to the portajohn make this a top priority)
Charmin on-the-go packs (see above)
large flashlight
blankets (for hillside lounging)
a good book (for the downtime)
crazy creek style "chair" (essential for hours spent sitting on the hillside)
sleeping bag
rain jacket
bathing suit
tank tops
a beach towel or 2
Yankees baseball cap
camping chair
cameras and lots of film
sunglasses
trail mix ingredients
apples
a cooler
Coke, water and a 6 pack of Sam Adams Summer Ale
spending money (can't avoid the merch tent)

Then, you add a few good friends. Many a wonderful musical act. Some good food. The fact that you're spending a couple of days away from the office. This will be my 5th FRFF...every year it's a little different and every year I discover a new delight. It's where I first heard the Nields, Eddie from Ohio, Crooked Still, Tracy Grammer, Lucy Kaplansky, Richard Shindell, Girlyman, We're About 9 and DaVinci's Notebook.

Life doesn't get any better than sitting under a blazing sun or a blanket of stars, singing along to music you love, surrounded by people you love (and a few thousand strangers), and feeling 1000% "home."

Stolen from kj

2007-07-09T10:36:00.000-07:00

OK, life's been nutty. And the 2 times I've tried to blog in the last month, blogger has been wonky. Here's another go at it...and because I'm feeling lazy, I'm stealing a quiz/survey thingy from kj. Maybe my next post will be the necessities for vacation--or Falcon Ridge as it may be.

A is for age: 28...though most people would put my inner child at about 7.

B is for beer of choice: Sam Adams Summer Ale...or Blue Moon.

C is for career: I'm currently in higher education...working for my alma mater and enjoying it as a job. But not as a career or a vocation.

D is for favorite Drink: CocaCola. Even if it means I am somehow evil in the eyes of some...I don't drink coffee, but I need caffeine! Iced tea is the runner up.

E is for Essential item(s) you use everyday: Toothbrush and toothpaste, for sure. Glasses or contacts so that I can see the world around me.

F is for Favorite song at the moment: So hard to choose. I've been singing along quite loudly to Dar's "The Hudson" in the last few days.

G is for favorite Game: Basketball.

H is for How About Whatever Favorite I Choose: Hmmmm...my favorite summer smell is rain.

I is for Instruments played: Guitar and Piano, both badly.

J is for favorite Juice: Cranberry juice

K is for Kids: I'm pro-kids ;) None for me at the moment, but I'll have a basketball team one of these days. For now, I borrow other people's children whenever they allow.

L is for last kiss: That's for me to know...

M is for marriage: Again, I'm pretty much pro-marriage, for any and all who want to enter into the union.

N is for full Name: In the interest of anonymity, first name starts with K, middle name begins with F and is my maternal grandmother's maiden name...and, I'm a Mc.

O is for Overnight hospital stays: Let's see, at least 2 nights at the age of 14 months for toe amputation, one night at the age of 13 for screws and plates in my forearm...I think that's it.

P is for phobias: No real phobias. Things I don't like, but no real phobias.

Q is for quote: "Oy with the poodles already."

R is for biggest Regret: Try not to have them. The worst decision I ever made still gave me a lot of great gifts.

S is for sports: I am pro-sports. To the point that I watched the Wimbledon finals yesterday even though I find tennis boring. Federer and Nadal are anything but boring. My Yanks are having a rough go of it, but I still love my boys from the Bronx. March Madness is a month of pure joy.

T is for Time you wake up: Depends...lately, I've been getting up at least once a week to work out before lunch--what is happening to me?!

U is for color underwear: whatever's on top of the pile

V is for Vegetable you love: Cucumbers and asparagus

W is for Worst Habit: I defer...if there's a decision to be made, I'd rather *anyone* other than me make it.

X is for X-rays you’ve had: Not counting dental x-rays, well, I can't even count. Seriously--I mean, just last week I had at least 4 taken of my knees. I should have a custom-made lead shield.

Y is for Yummy food you make: Lasagna

Z is for Zodiac sign: Stubborn as a bull, that's me! Somehow, I don't think I could be anything but Taurus.

A great weekend...

2007-06-09T21:54:00.000-07:00

I drove home tonight with tears in my eyes. And for the first time in 3 months, the tears weren't of frustration or uncertainty or sadness. The last few days have reminded me of all the reasons I love my current job, of all the reasons this job has felt right many times over the past 2 years.

It was the 2nd reunion weekend at HC...the "old man" reunion--the Classes of 1931 through 1956, the Classes of 1957, 1962, 1967, 1972 and 1977 were on campus. Only the Class of 1977 has female graduates, so it really is the old boys' club this weekend. They are delightful. The love and loyalty they have for the school I call home is remarkable. They love to tell "young folks" like me stories of their own days on the Hill and are eager to hear about my experiences.

Plus, I spent Thursday working on a seating chart with my boss (I LOVE the spatial relations and puzzle working of it all), we reworked it on Friday, then started from scratch today. 850 people in 824 seats...had to call and beg dining services to add 3 12-foot tables to the room. I've felt weirdly out of synch with my amazing and wonderful bosslady for the last 2 months...it was fun to have things feel normal again. I ate dinner with my closest work buddy and her husband, then we all headed to the pub. We were celebrating the dir. of alumni relations' retirement after 39 years. He's an incredible guy and we sat in the pub, singing along with the live Irish band, watching his granddaughter Irish step dance, begging Pat (the man of the evening) to sing and play the guitar, which he finally did. At the end of the night, it felt like Hootenanny in the Big Yellow or at kj/jb's. The band was breaking down, loaned a guitar to Pat and we sat around singing for half an hour more.

So, after spending the last few months thinking, "Why?? What is it I loved about this job again??" I've just been served a great reminder.

Plus, I had dinner with our Matt. What could be better? (Oh, Matt, tell Rachel that I met Ed--from her office at Brown--tonight. Neither of us could remember R's last name though--but he knew "my friend Matt's wife Rachel"--silly me!)

Thursday 13

2007-05-31T12:41:00.000-07:00

1. My knee hurts today.

2. The running is the hardest part of triathlon training. I hate running.

3. I have to buy a bike.

4. I have very little $$ for said bike, and bikes are wicked expensive.

5. May has been a crazy busy month, but I've had a lot of fun. I went to Ohio for my brother's college graduation--and played beer pong with my father and flip cup with my brother. I went to Miami for my cousin's graduation and spent my days and evenings in the pool and on the beach with my family. Nichole visited me and we looked at apartments for her very big, very exciting move to Boston. Plus, work has been crazy.

6. Speaking of work, I have a new co-worker. Nic and kj will tell you that he is bad news. They listened to me rant for quite some time. It's difficult because this new guy is part of our little 3-person team in our larger department. So I can't avoid him.

7. 8 years ago right now, I was in Mexico. HC runs an immersion trip every year--we spend our time visiting villages, listening to people's stories. We see with our own eyes and hear for ourselves stories of poverty, struggle and heartache, but also stories of immense and incredible faith. I went to the kickoff barbeque on Tuesday night for this year's trip. I wonder if they realized that the faces and voices they here in these weeks will be with them forever.

8. A new girl in our department moved into my apartment building in March, right down the hall. I'm headed over there to hang out and maybe order dinner and walk across the street for ice cream.

9. Our VP's assistant forgot to put one of my vacation days in the system...so, though I thought I had no time left to take, I have a "free" day to take before June 30...plus, since I spent extra hours babysitting last week (as part of the job), my boss is giving me a day off to compensate me. Now to figure out how to spend those days...

10. I really want to get better at photography. I just need to spend the time, energy and some of the money to make it happen. Maybe take a class? Who knows.

11. I need a good ocean swim--at a beach with waves. My sister and her friends have rented a house down the Jersey Shore this summer...maybe I'll take some long weekends. I love Cape Cod, but I need the waves!

12. I was having very vivid dreams for a while a few months ago, but they've stopped. A friend at work is big into dream interpretation/analysis. He claims that if I tell myself to dream, just as I'm drifting off to sleep, I should remember the dream in the morning.

13. 55 days until Falcon Ridge Folk Festival!

Triathlon training is getting to my head

2007-05-22T07:42:00.001-07:00

Head spinning and shoulders aching,
hands reaching up and out,
pulling through the water.

Each stroke brings a question:
Is this it?
Where you want to be?
Can you ever be certain?

A gulp of air and the questions start again.

Shoud you take the leap and step into the darkness?
Or leave both feet firmly planted on steady ground?
Are you better off here?
Was it the right choice?

Another blast of air, then the body spins forward,
flipping and bursting off of the wall,
back to where you came from.

But can you go back?
It would be different this time, right?
Could it be easier?
Will feeling safe and grounded make it better?

This time, a gasp of air,
shoulders throbbing and legs dragging.

Is the voice in the back of your head right, as it echoes old truths?
What will you do if it's not enough?
What's really so bad about hwere you are?
Could it be enough?

A deep breath and another flip,
hurtling back in the other direction,
the body ping-ponging like the questions in your head.

Legs begin to kick with this breath,
urging the body forward towards the finish,
away from unanswered questions.

Friday 10

2007-04-20T08:53:00.000-07:00

OK, so my spin on this Friday 10 is this: these are all songs from Grey's Anatomy. Producers find some *wonderful* tunes, week after week. Here are the titles, artists and a favorite lyric.

1. Nowhere Warm--Kate Havnevik
"You’re like a parachute descending from the sky And I’m sure you’re on your way Yes I’m sure you’re on the road."

2. Somewhere Only We Know--Keane
"I'm getting old and I need something to rely on. So, tell me when you gonna let me in, I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin."

3. Colors--Amos Lee
"I know we all, we all got our faults We get locked in our vaults and we stay But when you're gone all the colors fade"

4. Portions for Foxes--Rilo Kiley
"When the loneliness leads to bad dreams and the bad dreams lead me to callin' you and I call you and say "C'MERE!" "

5. Nothing Left to Lose--Mat Kearney
"Come on and we'll sing, like we were free push the pedal down watch the world around fly by us come on,try, one last time"

6. Make This Go On Forever--Snow Patrol
"The weight of water, the way you taught me to look past everything I had ever learned The final word in the final sentence you ever uttered to me was love"

7. Where We Gonna Go from Here--Mat Kearney
"Green grass and a radioWatching it fly past and away we go"

8. Unlike Me--Kate Havnevik
"I love the way You live so intensely Enjoy every minute of life With space to swing Your arms around Laughing loudly"

9. World Spins Madly On--The Weepies
"I watch the stars from my window sill The whole world is moving and I'm standing still"

10. Gabriel and the Vagabond--foy vance
"There was a young girl on the ground I knew she was fine and hard to cope She never was a fighter until he laid beside her And gently whispered hope"

Saturday Sixteen

2007-04-14T18:00:00.000-07:00

1. I just spent 3 days down the Cape with my mother, grandmother and aunt. My mother looked at real estate (a favorite pastime) and we wandered through Falmouth, Chatham and other towns.

2. I came up with a photography project for myself--the steeples of Cape Cod. If you know any churches with cool/different steeples on the Cape, send them my way. I saw a few cool ones this weekend...I think it'll be a spring/summer project.

3. I had a non-date tonight. Though, I'd eventually like it to be a date-date with this guy. We aren't sure this will happen. He needed to get back to St. Augustine and Thomas Aquinas tonight. Greta Jane knows this boy.

4. The next four weekends are going to be nutty. Next weekend, I go home to celebrate my 10th h.s. reunion and my dad's birthday. The following weekend, I'm taking a 4-day trip to D.C. to visit mostly with my best friend down there--we're supposed to see N&K, but now we might not. The first weekend in May is my bro's graduation in Ohio. The weekend after that, I am now spending 5 days in Miami (YAY!) to see my cousin graduate. My darling cousin Larissa will be in from London with her 2 year old and her 4 year old. Yippee!

5. We hired a new writer. I will soon have only one full time job and not 2...although we're adding to my job to change the title.

6. Netflix sent me 2 of the same disc instead of 2 different discs. I didn't realize this 3 days ago when I got the disc...I realized it today AFTER the mail had been picked up. So sad.

7. I'm ready for spring. It has not arrived in MA. They're still talking snow and Nor'easter conditions this week.

8. My favorite blanket in the world is a Holy Cross blanket made of a sweatshirt material. It is toasty warm and so soft--one of my favorite purchases of all time.

9. I miss teaching. I miss it more than I let myself admit. I miss being driven crazy on a daily basis and I miss the laughing--and the crying. I do NOT miss the planning and the grading--but distance makes me think that it wasn't all *that* bad.

10. A new favorite quote...to add to the ever-growing list:
"Once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return." --Leonardo da Vinci

Kinda ironic given #9, eh?

11. Top travel destinations for my future include the 3 A's: Africa, Alaska and Australia, in no particular order. A trip back to Ireland to see my fam and ride some horses wouldn't be so bad either.

12. When I get my tax return, I should do the responsible thing and invest it. But there are fun things I'd rather do with it. I hate being an adult sometimes.

13. I haven't found a great church in this area yet. Therefore, I'm not going to church every week. I really should look harder in the coming months.

14. I still intend to participate in a triathlon this year...probably in late August. Therefore, I need to get my rear in gear! So that I can swim 3/4 of a mile, bike 30 miles and run a 10K--back to back to back.

15. I've been to 30 states (I think)...I'll possibly hit Texas in December, bringing the total to 31.

16. After this week, I will not work another full, 5-day week until May 21.

Spring!

2007-04-03T07:08:00.000-07:00

Despite the grey, damp, gloomy day out my window, it is spring. How do I know this?

The Yankees opened in the Bronx yesterday. And they won...and Mo Rivera appeared just for the fun of it. A-Rod wore the stirrup socks up high on Opening Day--my brother predicts that if he does this for the year, he will be MVP. I like that logic, even though I do not like A-Rod. He dropped a freakin' pop-up...but then he homered. We shall see if this is the year he steps up as a big time player in a big time market.

What made that victory sweeter? The Sox lost on opening day...to the Kansas City Royals.

Good thing baseball is starting up--it helps with the letdown from March Madness. I could not have cared less about last night's FL v. OSU game, but tonight, Tennessee faces a scrappy Rutgers team and I'm psyched to watch it.

Life's been crazy this month. I'm doing 2 jobs at work until we hire a replacement for the development writer. While there are positives to the situation, my head is often spinning when I leave the office. I'm looking forward to heading home this weekend to celebrate my grandmother's birthday (we're not allowed to know how old) and a big family Easter with the DC, NY, CT and NJ cousins.

Monday at the BY

2007-03-01T14:02:00.000-08:00

N pointed out that a week from tonight, I'll be headed to the airport to pick her up. And a week from tomorrow, we see many BY friends. I'm so excited.

Here's my latest from my weekly BY group. NFN has been asking to hear more about my living situation--I could write for weeks--you all might hear some of it next weekend. But here's a little bit.

Sara unlocked the door to the apartment and stepped inside. She dropped a blue plastic bin overflowing with math tests and noun worksheets on the floor of the living room and grabbed a coke from the fridge. None of her roommates were back from work yet, so Sara settled in on the living room floor with her green pen, grade book and papers.

About halfway through the math tests, Sara heard a key in the door. Allison walked in and was down the hall in her bedroom before Sara could even say hello--not that Sara made any effort to call after her, either. After a year of living together, Sarah had grown tired of making the effort. Maybe this made her an equal partner in the problem.

Allison came back down the hall to flip through the mail on the kitchen table. She hadn't been home in a few days, so there was a stack.

"Hi, Al," Sara said, hesitantly.

Allison mumbled a greeting in return.

"How's it going? How's geometry?"

"Fine. Busy," Allison replied quickly before returning to her bedroom.

When Allison left 20 minutes later, Sara didn't even look up from her papers.

If someone came into the apartment and didn't know any better, one would assume that a group of friends occupied the small 2 bedroom, 2 bath apartment. The mantle and bookshelf were scattered with old family and friend photos of all four girls. Two desktop computers sat side-by-side on a long desk against the back wall of the living room.

Not so obvious was the fact that the four girls only had one bookshelf and one mantle, so it had to be shared space. The second bedroom was just big enough for two twin beds and two dressers, so the computers had to be in the living room. The kitchen table, which appeared homey with four bright placemats, was rarely used.

Sara had been sharing this space for almost a year. When she had decided to move 3,000 miles from home, the thought of living "in community" was appealling--not so scary to leave your whole world behind if you weren't going to be alone.

A few photos

2007-02-21T10:47:00.000-08:00

Work is crazy, life is busy. I miss blogging. Here are a few shots to sum up my week.

The February sky in Worcester. This doesn't even capture the brilliance of the purples and pinks that fill the western sky.

Snow out the back door of my apartment building...

My clocktower in winter.

If you look closely, you can see Dave Hower behind Katryna. It was a fantastic show at the homey Iron Horse. I had a wonderful time with kj, jb and ces. Plus, I got to dance with Lila during Tailspin.

I Am Living in Protest

2007-02-07T09:03:00.000-08:00

...at least this week. It's only Wednesday (at noon, no less) and yet I feel it should be Friday for all the crap that's happened. It's been a crappy, awful, stressful, bad week at work...got a project from admissions on Monday with a 2/20 deadline. However, the deadline was quickly changed to 2/15 and, due to travel plans in my department, I actually need to have everything for this Friday, 2/9. Which meant I had to get info out to the floor yesterday AM. Which means I worked until 8 PM on Monday night. Which means I missed Big Yellow. Which means I missed my driving home phone call with GJ. Which led to a stressful day yesterday because I had to distribute one project and finish another that was due today (and I had counted on having time Monday to devote to it).

So yeah, my week stinks. Sorry to vent. But there you have it.

First snow and furniture

2007-02-04T09:19:00.000-08:00

Friday night as I drifted off to sleep, I heard the snow plows outside. And yesterday morning, I woke up to find the ground covered in snow--no grass in sight. First time all winter. First time all winter in the state of Massachusetts. It's only February 4 though--there's still time for a storm or 2. Anyway, a celebration of snow:

Just before Christmas, students on campus did this to one of the pipes on campus. It was finally painted over this week. Not a great picture, but I loved walking past this every morning.

And finally, I got new furniture. Found it on craigslist, got a pretty good deal AND they delivered it. Good thing too considering the armoire/entertainment center is 79"x50"x24x!!

storage!

Basketballin'

2007-01-29T19:41:00.000-08:00

This is my writing from tonight's BY session. I'm not crazy about it, but I've been having a lot of trouble writing this year...the summer got me off track and I haven't quite found my groove again. So, I spent the first 40 minutes tonight coming up with ideas for future writing...then in the last 15 minutes or so, I jotted this down. If it seems a little random, blame little Lila--she was downstairs, craning her neck to grin at me and playing with my toes...how could I pay attention to my writing?!

I spent my weekend with basketball. In 3 days, I went to 4 games. Friday night, some work friends convinced me to join them for the HC men's game--the gym was packed. The game was being broadcast on ESPNU and it was Purple Pride Day--purple being HC's official color. Students were decked out in purple t-shirts, purple shorts, purple wigs, purple tights, purple boas and purple body paint. After the national anthem, they stayed on their feet and stood for the next 2 hours, jumping up and down, cheering and cursing at the refs every now and then. The end result was a HC victory--nice way to kick off the weekend.

Saturday afternoon, the HC women were up. I am a season ticket holder, and though we were off to a shaky 2-4 start in the league, thanks to 2 players blowing out their ACLs, I was hopeful. THe coach had provided me with tickets for my own 7th and 8th grade team and several of the girls were joining me. When I arrived at the gym, Emily, Emily and Bethie were waiting inside the door, already donning newly purchased purple t-shirts and rub-on tatoos. We waited for Ethel and Claire to arrive--they also had to buy purple t-shirts and wait in line for HC sophomores to apply Crusader head tatoos to their hands and cheeks.

Finally, we headed inside. I let the girls pick our seats--they wanted to sit next to the band, right under the basket--my least favorite vantage point. Quickly after tip-off, I realized that my vision of sitting and watching the game with the girls, discussing screens, offensive sets, and man to man defensewasn't going to happen. My girls were more interested in gossiping about boys at school and having their pictures taken with our big politacally incorrect Crusader mascot.

Sunday rolled around and it was time to coach. My head was so into the game (should we press? How can I get Michaela and Alysha in the game at the same time?) that I missed my exit. When I got to the gym, the girls were already warming up on the floor. 45 minutes, 4 time outs and lots of pacing later, we'd lost by 4. We played a good game and if 2 more of our shots had fallen, we'd have won.

To round off the weekend, I stayed and watched the game after ours. The team we (barely) beat last weekend was playing the team we will play next weekend. I wasn't planning to stay, but Michaela asked me to stay and watch the game--and discuss our loss. So, I watched my 4th game of the weekend, noting who we need to stop next weekend adn what we need to do to get a win--how to dominate in a 7th and 8th grade Catholic school league.

I need a new hobby.

Sometimes I live in a musical...

2007-01-22T08:55:00.000-08:00

I walked outside this morning to go to work...and it was snowing. Nothing huge, not even enough to be notable most winters. But today, this morning, after the "winter" New England has been having, I literally started to sing (very softly, mind you), "Oh the weather outside is frightful..." Snow was that exciting. As I look out my window right now, there is a dusting on the grass of the quad in front of the dining hall and even a little sticking to the pine tree in front of the dorm.

I can't sing. At all. It's frightening to hear me sing (a few of you have and I apologize). But I sing all the time. I sing in the car and I sing (quietly) in my office when music is playing. It makes me happy to sing. And oftentimes, like this morning, a song will pop into my head when I see a tree, a blue sky, a red car, kids walking to the bus...just about anything. Billy Joel, Guster, Broadway showtunes, Dar, Linda Eder, Counting Crows, Grey's Anatomy music, the Nields, the great Matt Harvey...they all pop into my head as I go about my day and sometimes I just can't help it--I sing along.

Also, I just want to point you all to a blog that you may or may not have time to visit and that you may or may not want to visit. Rob Rummel-Hudson has a blog (and a soon-to-be book) in which he tells tales of his life as father to his amazing 7 year old daughter, Schuyler. I don't know Schuyler or Rob, but I've been following their story for over 2 years. Schuyler can't speak...but somehow, thanks to Rob, we all hear her loud and clear. The top blog on this page is particularly fantastic, so I'm choosing now to share.

Schuyler's Monster

TGIF!

2007-01-12T12:57:00.000-08:00

Fridays are wonderful. A week ago, I headed out to Northampton and Big Yellow for a wonderful weekend full of friends and a pair of big blue eyes. This evening, I'll climb in my car and drive home to NJ. We have a family surprise 60th b-day party tomorrow night in Washington, DC. I'll ride down to DC with my parents, thereby saving some money! I'm psyched to see my cousins and have some family time.

It's been a long week and I wish I had more to say. I promise to try to rally for a great entry or 2 next week. Happy Friday!

And if you haven't checked out Ms. kj's blog, get over there! She's a grandmother!!

2007 so far

2007-01-03T08:02:00.000-08:00

I'm back in the office. It's been 11 days since I've been at work. I'm happy to see my friends here, but not thrilled to be back at work. I had a delightful holiday season. Christmas is my favorite time of year and this year did not disappoint. I had a few "downtime" days after Christmas, then headed to JFK to pick up N on Friday morning. We drove to Philly and spent a wonderful, fun-filled weekend with A & G...even had a GJ sighting or 2. Here's my break in photos (on my new digicam!)

1.
This is my Christmas tree--the one I chopped down all on my own. It's the size of a Charlie Brown, but it has character.

This is my parents' tree. A 14 footer that put mine to shame.

2.
Some of my favorite ornaments on the family tree.

3.
My father and sister cleaning out my sister's car. My mother wanted the moment documented--I think it's the first time since my sister got the car 3 years ago that it's been cleaned!

4.
Yarn! When N and I arrived on Friday afternoon, A took us for a walk in her neighborhood...which just so happened to include a stop at a yarn store called Loop. It provided a great chance for me to play with my camera while N shopped.

Yarn ornaments!

5. After lunch and yarn, we wandered into a British soap/lotion/shampoo store called "Lush." Phun Photo opportunities were everywhere.

Bath balls. According to N, drop one of these in the bathtub and they "plop, plop, fizz, fizz" like an Alkaseltzer, making for an enjoyable bathtime experience.

Shampoo bars. One of these is supposed to last 80 washes, according to the sign.

6.
No trip to Philly is complete without cheesesteaks. Even if you have to wait in line.

7. Knitting in progress. N's sock and GJ's baby sweater.

8.
Historic Philly.

9. Curious kitties.

10.
G and I have similar taste in beer. It was a great party.

So there you have it--my vacation in a nutshell. So very happy that this is a short week. This weekend, I will see A again--and kj too!

Seasonal musings

2006-12-19T07:02:00.000-08:00

Santa is real. Ask the families at Immaculate Conception School in Alphabet City and they'll tell you. Seven years ago, their Santa visited the school for the first time. She watched the students in their uniform plaid line up quietly in the hallway and she waved and smiled as they passed-eyebrows raised towards this stranger. She turned to the principal, a nun in her 60s dressed in full habit, standing tall at 5 foot nothing.

"Give me the names of those children who will have nothing under the tree on Christmas morning."

The next day, this Santa received a fax with a list of 16 names-boys and girls with their ages and sizes beside them. She called a friend or 2 and they hopped in the car. As they drove towards the highway lined with every store imaginable, they made a plan. Each child would get a winter coat, pajamas, sweats and a nicer weekend outfit. Every child would get a book, a puzzle and a toy. At each store, they took their assignments and split up, meeting a half hour later, arms fully loaded. That evening, they called more friends.

"You don't have to shop, but can you chip in to help give these kids a Christmas?"

The bags piled high and it really did begin to look like the Santa's Workshop in those old claymation movies like Rudolph. Each item was tagged with a child's name, age and size, grouped together by family. Teenage sons and daughters wrapped each gift, and in abou ta week, the sleigh-ok, the van was loaded to head back to New York City.

The week after Christmas, this Santa had yet another note in the mail. Parents and children alike were thrilled and awed by this mystery Santa and her ability to provide the perfect gifts.

Over the years, the list has grown from 16 to 30 children. Every year, Santa and her elves climb into the car early in the morning, stop at Dunkin' Donuts for some fuel and share the magic of Christmas with those who need a reminder that Santa is real.

T13

2006-12-14T11:56:00.000-08:00

I am woefully behind in blogworld. I promise to catch up on all of your blogs very soon, but first I thought I'd do a T13 to catch you up on the 13 days since my last post.

1. The b-ball team is 2 and 0. The final score of the first game was 21-18. The second game finished at 28-27 in OverTime! We've only had one practice and it's pure chaos on the court. Tonight at practice, we plan on teaching the girls an actual offense and an inbounds play. We play our third game on Sunday, then we're off til 1/7.

2. I organized a successful scholarship reception for about 200 people. Later that evening, I read at the the College's annual Festival of Lessons and Carols--the night officially makes it feel like Christmas. It helped that there was a light snow swirling outside the chapel at the end of the night.

3. Last Saturday, I chopped down my very own Christmas tree. She's very Charlie Brown in stature...though much fuller than C.B.'s famous tree. 3 feet tall and about as wide as she is tall, but just perfect. Next Friday when I head home, I plan to throw the tree in the back seat for my parents' living room--but first I'll get pictures of my 3 footer next to their 15 footer!

4. Work has been full-throttle. It's exhausting and, at times, frustrating, but we're hanging in there. Our department Christmas luncheon is tomorrow at my favorite restaurant--nothing can top that!

5. I pulled an 11-13 year old girl and a female from the nursing home off the Giving Tree at work. Gifts are due tomorrow and I do not have gifts. Tonight, on my way home from b-ball practice, I'll be stopping at the mall.

6. None of my Christmas shopping is even started. I love love love Christmas, but I am not a good gift person--sometimes I get inspired, but otherwise, it's painful. I hate shopping, so that does not help my cause.

7. Though the last 3 Monday nights have been a bit shorter since I haven't been to Northampton, I do miss my B.Y. friends. I look forward to diving back in this coming Monday.

8. This past Sunday night, I was dead tired and had to babysit overnight. Usually, I try to get the kids to play board games, shoot some hoops, build with Legos, etc. This week, I pulled the youngest onto my lap and we watched the oldest play a handheld video game (he really wanted to show me, but he didn't need an audience of three!). I then let them watch an hour and a half of bad TV before bed. I did read aloud from Harry Potter 6 for a while too.

9. I've been missing new TV. There are some nights I come home and I just want to throw on the TV and find a new episode of a favorite show. No such luck. In the meantime, I have watched several episodes of Sex and the City. Wow.

10. Since I have not seen a couple of my Boston friends since the first weekend in October, we are trying to arrange a get together for this weekend. Hopefully it will happen because I miss them dearly.

11. I've been trying to unpack more in the apartment. The effort has been somewhat unsuccessful as I am too tired when I get home.

12. Today, I spent most of the morning (even though I have a million things to do) editing 2 of my brother's take home finals - one was on British literature and the other on US foreign relations.

13. Last night, I served Midnight Breakfast to students from 11 PM til 1 AM. It's exam week and dining services runs a Midnight Breakfast program and encourages faculty and staff to serve the eggs, bacon, sausage, hash browns, egg & cheese sandwiches, pancakes, toast and waffles. I came home feeling covered in grease.

And so it begins...

2006-12-01T12:07:00.000-08:00

I just got this email:

Quote:
" 'Cue' (or 'Q'?) & E are sooo cool!"
-- Claire , 7:45 p.m. last night.
End Quote.

Our first basketball practice was last night. It was a wild hour and a half and I was reminded that 12, 13 and 14 year old girls communicate in squeals, shrieks and squeaks. Honestly, only dogs can understand what they are saying. 14 of them in a "gym" (cafeteria/auditorium/fake gym) for an hour and a half...exhausting. The girls are cute and most of them have *some* idea of how to play...but our first game is Sunday. I find myself sad that we don't have more time to get ourselves together--I barely know what name goes with what face! (Plus, we have Emily/Elizabeth/Ellen/Ethel/Emily...and Abby/Alysha...and Molly/Michaela/Megan, so it's a constant tongue twister!)

But then this afternoon, I got that email. It's from a colleague of mine with a daughter on the team. Apparently, we're a hit. I'm "Q"--nickname I acquired in L.A. from the kids at school and my co-coach is "E" for Erin. Apparently, we passed the test and we're officially in.

The game on Sunday should be HYSTERICAL...and maybe a little scary.

A Tuesday 13

2006-11-28T07:21:00.000-08:00

Hello, all! I hope your holiday festivities were wonderful. I love Thanksgiving...none of the Christmas pressure and chaos. Good family, good friends and good food are the only requirements. Not that I don't love Christmas, because I do...but the whole "perfect gift" for everyone is stressful!

On with the show...

1. I finally gave in and got myself a MA license. The actual license came in the mail yesterday. Under "Sex" is the letter M. That's not right.
2. Thanksgiving was small this year--only 15 of us. Still had a great time.
3. The next night, 20 of us gathered in a cafe on 21st Street in NYC to visit with my cousin Amanda and her daughter Yasmin. They are visiting from Sydney, Australia. It's been 3 years since we've seen them.
4. Amanda is 9 years older than I am. She was raised in Australia, but came to live in NYC when I was about 12 and stayed for about 10 years. I definitely idolized her--this cool, Australian who seemed to have all the answers.
5. I want everyone to like me. It hurts my feelings immensely when I think or know someone doesn't like me--even if that person's a bitch. I'm working on this.
6. There is one person at work in particular--she doesn't like me. I don't like her either, and there's a laundry list of reasons why...but still, it bugs me that she doesn't like me.
8. I'm getting better at just ignoring her and focusing on spending my time, energy and lunch hours on people I genuinely like. It seems like a much wiser use of time.
9. Basketball practice starts this week. Our first game is Sunday! I don't even know the girls' names yet.
10. I have lots of Christmas shopping to do, and NO ideas as to what to buy.
11. The weather is making me sad. I hate global warming--I love snow.
12. Because someone asked me today, I'll share my answer with you all too...my favorite names are Conor and Caroline.
13. Now that I've finished waxing my eyebrows, it's time for bed. Don't you just love the completely random information I share with y'all in these Thirteens?

Snow

2006-11-22T08:27:00.000-08:00

As school wrapped up for Christmas vacation, Sara spent a morning lesson planning for the first week of January. Her class was down the hall in the gym, practicing their Christmas pageant song and dance. She had decided to take advantage of some peace and quiet. They would be starting a new story in the reading anthology after break and when she flipped ahead, she saw the story's title: Snow Day. The vocabulary words included drift, plow, frost and snow angel. Her classful of 7 year olds from South Central Los Angeles would have little, if any, experience with anything having to do with snow. Sara would try to dig through photo albums over Christmas break and look for pictures to illustrate these otherwise abstaract concepts.

On Christmas morning, Sara woke up to the familiar scraping in her driveway. Out her window, she saw that the world had been blanketed in a thick coat of white. Grabbing her camera, she ran outside to catch the plow in action. Later that day, Sara cajoled her grumpy brother into making snow angels and snapped a snowblower in action. She captured the snow piled up higher than the bumper of her family van and made her brother stand waist deep in a drift.

Back in California, Sara sat cross-legged on the floor in a circle of 8 students.

"How many of you know what a snow day is?"

No response.

"Have any of you ever seen snow?"

Wendy raised her hand slowly.

"My mama took us to Big Bear Mountain. We made snowballs."

"How deep was the snow? How much was on the ground?"

Wendy thought for a moment, "We could still see some of the grass under the snow."

"Can you imagine having so much snow that they cancel school?"

Wendy shook her head, eyes wide. The rest of the group laughed.

Sara pulled out the picturesfrom Christmas morning and passed them around the circle. She explained how snow plows cleared the streets and how people used snow blowers and shovels to clear sidewalks and driveways. She told them about 5:30 AM phone calls that meant you could sleep until 9 and then spend the whole day playing in the snow and drinking hot chocolate. Sara had also brought a few pictures of herself at 6 or 7 years old, playing in a snowfilled yard and sledding down the hill in front of the high school. Her kids squealed with delight--the thought that Sara had ever been a little kid was hilarious to them.

After a few snowy stories about life in New Jersey, Sara reviewed the target vocabulary, making each student point out the term in one of her pictures. When she felt confident that the words had become concrete objects, they opened their textbooks and began to read.

a twist on the Random 10

2006-11-15T08:30:00.000-08:00

Sorry I've been M.I.A.! I'll be better, I promise.

I got this from a friend...I'm looking forward to seeing what your soundtracks are!

IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button

Opening Credits: Another Horsedreamer's Blues (Counting Crows)
Waking up: Jesus on the Radio (Guster)
Falling in Love: Mercy House (The Nields)
Fight Song: If He Never Said Hello (Linda Eder)
Breaking up: Blister in the Sun (Violent Femmes)
Prom: As Long as You're Mine (Wicked)
Life: After All (Linda Eder)
Mental Breakdown: I Spy (Guster)
Driving: It Happens Every Day (Dar Williams)
Flash Back: The Sweetness (Nerissa and Katryna Nields)
Getting Back Together: Ali Boumaye (Nerissa and Katryna Nields)
Wedding: From Me to You (The Beatles)
Birth of a Child: She's Saving Me (Indigo Girls)
Final Battle: All My Pretty Horses (The Nields)
End Credits: What Do You Love More Than Love (Dar Williams)

slacker

2006-11-14T06:32:00.000-08:00

That's me! As our friend GretaJane reminded me last night, I am woefully behind on blogging and commenting. I'm going to try to make up some ground today. As a start, here's my piece from last night's Big Yellow session.

* * * * *

I don't remember learning how to play basketball. I've known how to dribble, pass and shoot for as long as I can remember. Throw that hard, orange sphere at my face and my hands will catch it, instinctively dribbling, spinning and playing mindlessly with it. My mom taught us how to play--she'd played ball in college, coached and reffed for years. At the age of 15, she started to run clinics in the South Bronx for elementary and high school students. Naturally, she'd raised her children with a ball in hand.

My sister and I attended one ballet lesson when I was about 6--Erin was 4. My mom still insists it was our idea. At the end of class, the teacher walked over to my mother and suggested that we find a different activity for Tuesday afternoons. Halfway through ballet class, I'd turned to her and asked for the ball.

When I was 9, my father's best friend began coaching the Fordham University women's basketball team. That summer, he started a girls' basketball camp. My mom signed on as a coach and we spent the next 4 summers playing ball and living for a week or 2 in the Fordham dorms.

When I was 13 years old, I fell out of a chairlift while on a day long ski trip. The 30 foot fall snapped my arm in half. When the orthopedic surgeon determined that surgery to insert stell plates and screw was the only way to stabilize my arm, I didn't flinch. When he followed that with the fact that contact sports were off limits for at least 2 years, I was devastated. High school was just a few months away and he was effectively telling me that I wouldn't see playing time on a field or a court.

A few years later, on the first day of college orientation, I turned around while in line for my ID to find Mary O'Reilly standing behind me. Mary and I had played on the same team one summer at camp when we were about 10. As we waited for our turn for ID photos, we began planning our intramural basketball team for that fall. My skills were rusty at best, but it didnt' talk long for my muscles to remember the mechanics and rhythms of the game.

In 2 weeks, I'll begin coaching my own team of 7th and 8th grade girls. I've never had to coach a team all by myself and I'm already racking my brain, trying to remember drills for practice and different offensive sets for games. I've been told that the girls don't have a solid foundation of basic skills, so I've been making lists of the drills I can remember that are designed to teach the basics of passing and rebounding, the art of the free throw and the mechanics of a lay up. Thanksgiving weekend will be spent discussing strategy with my mom and coming up with offensive plays that we can call "Holy Cross," "Syracuse" and "Duke." I'm planning a Saturday afternoon or two when I can bring my girls to watch the HC women play so that they can see what a tight zone defense actually looks like.

I'm not looking to win the league title or even have a winning record (though that would be nice!). In the end, I want to create an atmosphere for the girls to have fun, hopefully learn a little and laugh a lot. And honestly, I can't wait to be back on a court with a ball in my hand helping to make that happen.

Thursday Thirteen

2006-11-02T19:11:00.000-08:00

1. I have to work for part of this weekend.
2. Before I help with a black tie event Saturday evening, I'll be getting a haircut.
3. I'm not sure how much of a haircut I'm getting.
4. I love taking pictures. (I'm sure this shocks you all!)
5. This week, I bought some frames and ordered some prints...soon, they will be on my walls.
6. My blank walls are driving me crazy.
7. I'm going to Denver from Tuesday until Saturday for work.
8. While I'm there, I'll visit with a friend from home--I haven't seen her in 4 or 5 years.
9. My cousin Amanda is coming in from Australia for Thanksgiving.
10. She's bringing her 6 year old daughter, Yasmin.
11. Amanda is quite ill, but hopefully I'll get a good visito or two in with her and with Yazzie.
12. My cousin Hannah will be home from South Carolina too.
13. It's time for bed.

Happy Anniversary to us

2006-10-31T19:06:00.000-08:00

25 years ago on Halloween night, a woman knocked on our front door. My parents had just moved their little family (2 1/2 year old and 8 month old little girls) from New Rochelle, NY to Ramsey, NJ on that very day. The woman at the door, AQ, lived 2 doors down with her husband, DQ, and their 2 kids. And so began our life in Ramsey.

Ramsey is a family town--there are 3 elementary schools, a middle school and a high school--plus a Catholic elementary school and an all-boys Catholic high school. We celebrate "Ramsey Day" every September--complete with a street fair and fireworks. There's an amazing park with 8 baseball/softball fields, 3 basketball courts, 2 tennis courts and a huge playground that the town built together one summer when I was about 8.

I grew up in that park. My dad played in a summer Sunday softball league for about 12 years. He joined the summer after we moved to Ramsey at AQ's husband's suggestion. It was a team of men in their 30s, for the most part, so there was a whole flock of kids under the age of 8. There were barbeques and pool parties, playdates and new additions. My first best friends were boys from this group. As we got older, my sister and I became the big kids who escorted the little ones to the playground and supervised so that the moms could talk and watch the games. Later, I played softball myself on those fields. Ramsey's recreational sports program is enormous--my parents spent weekends of their lives at soccer, basketball, softball, baseball and football games (and swim meets too). My parents served as coaches for our baseball, softball and basketball teams. My siblings and I grew up walking to the Catholic elementary school across town and riding our bikes to the stores on Main Street or over to our friends' houses. My brother and his friends could walk into town for bagels, sandwiches and baseball cards by the time they were eight years old--it was just that kind of town.

I'm not sure if my parents intended to stay in Ramsey for so long, or if they really knew the kind of community they had chosen. I do know that I'm eternally grateful for their decision and the life it gave me. It was the perfect place to grow up. It's a town where you wave at least 3 times as you drive down Main Street because you see people you know. When I come home for a visit these days, I bump into old friends at church and in the supermarket. The guys who run the deli and the pizza place know who I am and ask how "mama" is doing these days. As for my parents, I think they're pretty happy with their choice too--when I talked to my mom last night, she was headed out to the bar for a glass of wine with a friend from town. And yesterday she was able to say "Happy Anniversary" to the woman who came to our front door 25 years ago Halloween night with a casserole--AQ is the 2nd grade aide at my mother's school.

Magic Happens There

2006-10-30T09:02:00.000-08:00

As we walked up the hill from our offices on Friday afternoon, my friend and colleague JD looked at me and said, "You're living life right." I had just told her of my weekend plans--to gather with old friends and new in a cozy living room in a big yellow house in Northampton.

I thought a lot about JD's comment this weekend. When I sit in that living room, pen on paper, I revisit a time in my life that was lonely and miserable. I felt isolated partly because I was--both physically and emotionally--and partly because I didn't know how to seek out connections in that strange city.

When I moved to MA last summer, Nerissa suggested that I join a writing workshop and I figured, "What the hell?" I never expected to discover the safety, security, community and joy that I've experienced in my writing workshops. So, I keep coming back--I delve deeper and deeper into my three years in L.A. All the while I am mindful of the fact that I'm making up for lost time. I am taking advantage of an opportunity that makes me happy and whole and leaves me "under the influence."

I'm going to fall in line behind *A* and give you a "top ten" weekend recap:
1) Team George. Rematch in March?
2) The hootenanny at kj and jb's house.
3) Songwriters...what a fabulous addition to the group!!
4) The power blowing out in A & my room on Sunday morning.
5) Seeing 3D (shy) versions of Charlotte and Iris.
6) Successfully fitting 11 of us (plus Lila) around the dinner table for family dinner on Saturday night.
7) Wandering through "Faces" with A & N on Saturday afternoon.
8) Thai food on the way out of town on Sunday.
9) Lila (c'mon, she had to make my top 10)
10) The exciting, fresh and totally outstanding writing that came out of this weekend from all of our pens and guitars.

This past weekend couldn't have been more perfect. It was the reunion I'd been waiting for with my January friends--with some perfect additions to the crowd. I look forward to our March reunion.

T13: Big Yellow Edition

2006-10-26T06:27:00.000-07:00

Here's what I'm looking forward to...

1) Seeing kj, A, N and M!!
2) New people with new writing
3) Tea and Cookies
4) NFN's cooking
5) Lunch at the Brewery
6) Saturday afternoon freedom in Noho
7) 3D versions of Charlotte and Iris (and Eli too)
8) Testing a new motel (am I *really* looking forward to this?!)
9) Hearing the brilliant writing of wonderful people
10) Sweet Lila girl
11) Seeing N's Gatsby Girl
12) Crazy amounts of laughter
13) It is worth repeating--a WHOLE weekend with kj, A, N and M!!

Tuesday 13

2006-10-24T12:55:00.000-07:00

A little late on the Thursday 13! I went home on Wednesday night for a visit with the Irish cousins. We had a grand weekend--lots of family, food and some NYC sightseeing to boot.

1. The Irish cousins have replacement knees, hips and shoulders.

2.
Therefore, we took an aquatic tour of NYC on this boat.

3.
We saw the Empire State Building (it was a grey day, but fairly warm and not raining).

4.
And the Statue of Liberty.

5.
We came up on the south side of Manhattan.

6.
And under the Brooklyn Bridge.

7.
The World Financial Center with the restored Wintergarden Theater in between--my dad's part of the City.

8.
No trip is complete without a stop at St. Pat's!

9. All a far cry from home for them.

10. Friday night, we went out to dinner in Gramercy Park.

11. Notice the picture of Gregory Peck hanging over the table. I love Atticus Finch.

12.
The whole group at Saturday night's dinner party.

13. The group includes cousins and 2 women who traveled to Ireland with my mom in the early 70s.

Weekend happenings

2006-10-16T13:54:00.000-07:00

I am still in recovery mode from a non-stop weekend. It was, however, just what I needed after a particularly trying week at work. This week isn't much better, so I'm grateful for a fun and chaotic weekend.

Friday night, I decided at the last minute to join a few work friends on a jaunt to wonderful Northampton, MA. Our VP's son and his band (Okkervil River) played the 10 PM show at the Iron Horse. We met up with some of Meg's friends for thai food, then wandered over to the IH. I'd NEVER seen such a line--going in both directions, up and down the street, wrapping around into parking lots. The boys had played Buffalo the night before and due to 2 feet of snow, had a tough time getting out. So they were just arriving at 9:30 when doors were supposed to open. We stood out in the cold for an hour and the show didn't finish til 2 AM, but it was fun. A different sound than I'm used to, but I really liked it and the venue was perfect.

Saturday, after sleeping in due to a 3:15 am homecoming, I went to my friend Kelley's wedding. It was in Andover, MA and it couldn't have been prettier. Kel's mom died soon after Kelley graduated from HC, so it was a little bittersweet, but Kel and her husband seemed very happy. We danced the night away to some of the best music I've ever heard at a wedding. I generally hate dancing, but it was well worth it.

Yesterday, I traveled with my friend Bethany to New Haven, CT. Since I missed N&K at the Iron Horse on Saturday night, I made up for it with their New Haven house concert. It's become my favorite show of the year. 25 or 30 of us packed into a tiny living room, surrounded by wonderful music. Lots of new songs that made me anxious for the new CD release. It won't leave my cd player for months, I'm sure. Perfect way to end the weekend.

As if that's not enough, as N reminded me earlier today, in 11 short days I will see many of you. I'm just giddy. I will miss those of you who are not there dearly, though!

T13

2006-10-12T16:39:00.000-07:00

Sorry I've been MIA. Work has been absolutely crazy and I'm pretty spent. I will try to catch up on your blogs tonight and tomorrow night. I'm thinking of you all though...and getting increasingly excited for the Big Yellow retreat. 15 days!

1. I bought a 6-pack of Blue Moon last night.
2. Since I don't have roommates to drink/eat my stuff anymore, the remaining 5 bottles should last me til Thanksgiving.
3. I love the fall.
4. I'm going to my 2nd wedding as many weekends on Saturday night.
5. The director of the Chaplains' Office at HC is one of my favorite people in the world.
6. We scheduled our first lunch of the school year for the Friday of retreat weekend--great way to start if all off.
7. Next week, my grandmother's cousins are coming from Ireland for 5 days--they've never been to the States. I'm psyched to see them.
8. Thanks to my parents, my apartment now has a love seat in the living room.
9. After boiling pasta for dinner last night, I realized I had neither tupperware for the leftovers or a colander to drain the ravioli.
10. In using the top to drain the water, I dumped half the pasta down the drain. That solved the leftovers problem.
11. I ordered new stationery this week.
12. The cards are handmade by my youth minister from high school. Weehah! Cards
13. Let's Go Mets! (I'm still a (depressed) Yankee fan, but in their absence, I'll pull for the Mets)

quick check in

2006-10-04T12:08:00.000-07:00

Ah, October is here. As I drove out to Noho on Monday night, the sunset was incredible and the light on the trees along the Pike was breath-taking. The leaves are beginning to change and the sunset cast them all in a golden glow. It's going to be a busy month (2 weddings, a huge work event, visit from Irish relatives and a fabulous BY retreat)--but I'm psyched.

Yesterday was my parents' 30th anniversary. Monday night's prompt got me thinking and I wound up writing some of what I've learned about love from my parents. NFN called it a prescription for love...whatever it is, I thought I'd share.

*You can never have too many friends. Make them at every opportunity. Throw parties where you bring those you’ve known for 10 days, 10 years and 40 years together in one place. It’s important to have friends who make you laugh, friends who will jump in front of a bus for you and friends who will sit up until 1 AM, with a bottle of wine, to plan a funeral with you.

*Be there for the little things. Coach your daughter’s basketball team and your son’s baseball team. Take a Saturday to go to Jones Beach. Make a fool of yourself to make your child-or your spouse-laugh.

*Support each other. When my father gets up at 5 AM to catch a train into the city, my mom is there with him—every day for 30 years. My mother decided to go back to school for her doctorate last year. Just when my father thought he was through with tuition, he began again.

*Smile a lot. Hold hands. Enjoy each others’ company. Take long walks on the beach. Eat dinner together. Have date nights. Ski, swim and bike tighter. Do your own thing every once in a while. Laugh.

a late 13...moving day edition

2006-09-29T12:15:00.000-07:00

1. I sign my lease in less than an hour.
2. It's at a different apartment than I thought it would be last weekend.
3. I hate feeling unsettled.
4. I cry when I am frustrated--pretty much the only time I cry.
5. So, there have been some tears this week.
6. When a coworker came to check on my progress on Tuesday, I almost burst into tears just talking about being frustrated and unsettled.
7. She gave me a hug and burst into tears herself.
8. I'm grateful to have people to lean on and who lean on me in return.
9. My car is currently packed to the gills.
10. After I sign my lease, I'll be unloading my car, driving back to the house and loading up again.
11. My father and uncle arrive tomorrow morning to help move my bedroom furniture.
12. It will require a uHaul rental.
13. Is it Monday yet?

cheat post

2006-09-25T19:56:00.000-07:00

My writing from tonight...more real stuff tomorrow, I hope. You should know that this is "Sara's" story...just from the first person point of view...switched it up tonight.
*** *** *** *** ***
I should have known better. The far-end of my classroom is cluttered with boxes in various stages of paper mache and paint. Some stand 3 boxes tall, others are in pieces. All of them block the path to my desk--and to the lockers where my students store their backpacks and sweaters. There is a bin filled with newspaper and half-empty bottles of starch and another bin filled with paints, brushes and rags. I really should have known better.

Two months ago, Nancy--the 7th grade teacher, fellow coach of the middle school girls' basketball team and general partner-in-crime--approached me with an idea--a project our classes could work on together--totem poles. It would be an art project and a writing project combined. After all, totem poles were supposed to tell a stories. I hesitated from the get-go because art is far from my strong suit, but Nancy--B.A. in art in-hand--assured me that she would take care of that end--she would supervise the construction of the totem poles from boxes, through newspaper tearing, starching and paint. And, having temporary amnesia, I agreed.

I agreed even though just a few months earlier, we had been ear-deep in another of her crazy projects. Each year during Lent, classes were paired up and responsible for a dramatization of the Stations of the Cross. Most grades simply read through the stations while acting them out. The classes took a week to practice their renditions during religion time and in the half hour before dismissal. Nancy, of course, had a better idea for the 7th and 2nd grades. She took the images from my Stations of the Cross coloring book and, using overhead projectors, had her students trace the images onto 9' x 9' paper. All 14 stations were then painted cooperatively by the 2nd and 7th grades. This took the better part of a week and a half to complete. Once the painting finished, Nancy cut each 9'x9' rendering into 9 separate squares. Preparations moved from the gym floor to the church. As each station was read, my 2nd graders came out to re-enact the scene. As they did so, 9 of Nancy's 7th graders flipped up the squares--sports arena style--to reveal corresponding station. We rehearsed endlessly--Nancy was a perfectionist and this was going to be the best presentation ever. When her "flippers" complained that they were tired, Nancy shot back, "Jesus died on te Cross, you didn't hear him complaining. Suck it up!" She was a little too into it.

So, as I said, I should have known better. But I agreed to the totem pole project--now referred to as Totem Hell (by me, not the kids). The totem pole stories had been an adventure in themselves, having 7 year olds and 13 year olds as co-authors--genius! Now that the stories were complete, each animal in the story needed to be reflected on the totem pole. Boxes were stacked and taped together, beaks for eagles and snouts for bears were construced and taped into place. Nancy's promise to run this leg of the project is a distant memory. Every time we start to work on the totems, she's called into a meeting.

So it's me, 70 kids and 35 totem poles every day in the parking lot. I've never really paper mache'd before and bottles of starch are being knocked over on the blacktop at an alarming rate. One night, I actually bought out K-Mart's entire stock of liquid starch.

At the end of each day, Totem Hell gets returned to my classroom--I'm not sure who's decision that was. But the school year ends in 2 weeks and I'm determined to finish every one.

Relief

2006-09-22T15:34:00.000-07:00

I am 99% sure that I have an apartment. I think I'll be signing a lease on Monday. I love the place...it's teeny tiny, but since I'm the only one living there, it's fine. I'm signing a 6 month lease because it's street parking and on the first level on a main street. If either of those become a problem, I don't want to be stuck for a year. In 6 months, I'll likely sign another lease, probably for a year. I will email you all the website where you can see pictures. I love the fact that it has character. The previous tenant painted, so the kitchen is a burnt pumpkin, the living room is a sunny yellow and the bedroom is a sage green. There's a working woodburning fireplace that is original to the building from the 1920s and a pretty stained glass window in the living room. I could start the move in as early as next Tuesday!

In other news, my mother is beside herself with excitement. Cousins from Ireland (in their 70s) are coming for a visit in October (thankfully not Big Yellow weekend!)--they've never been to the U.S. My mother spent 3 summers with them when she was in her early 20s and I've spent time with them on both of my trips to Ireland. I can't wait to see them and to spend some time showing them NYC. John is a vet and was a world-class equestrian/jumper back in the day. He and his wife Eileen are delightful and hysterical. My brother was named for John--his surname, Blake, is Ryan's middle name. So, my mom's pretty happy and so am I.

I also booked my November conference in Denver. 4 days that I'm "working" but not in the office. It's the week following our on-campus, black tie campaign celebration, so I'm sure I'll need the escape.

This weekend, I'll catch up with a T13 and maybe even a Friday 10.

T13

2006-09-14T13:41:00.000-07:00

Hello all. I'm sorry for my lack of blogging--I have tried to comment on all of your blogs though! Work is a bit crazed at the moment, but in a good way. The apartment hunt has come to a shuddering halt because I have no time to look and I'm really discouraged by what I've seen.

**disclaimer--the following is a grammatical mess. I am too tired and too grumpy to care.**

1. Fall is arriving in MA.
2. This means sweaters--and I love sweaters.
3. I had a massage yesterday.
4. It felt nice in the moment, but I'm pretty tight and pained again already.
5. Maybe I need to think about a chiropracter--I haven't been since high school.
6. I think falling 30 feet out of a chairlift and landing on my feet screwed with my back permanently.
7. Some friends at work are going through really tough times right now.
8. The feeling of helplessness that leaves me with is one of my least favorite things in the world.
9. For her birthday, I am giving one of these friends a free night of babysitting--she and her husband can get out and enjoy an evening--I'll play with their boys and their puppy.
10. I'm terrified that I'll walk into BY next week and freeze--that I'll have nothing to write, because right now, I have NO clue!
11. I've always been very extroverted, but lately, I've noticed myself hanging back and staying quiet more and more.
12. I'm looking forward to catching up with Grey's Anatomy season 2 this weekend.
13. This past year, in this job, in this state, with the activities I've been involved in (like BY) has been the happiest since I graduated from college.

cross your fingers, please

2006-09-06T13:54:00.000-07:00

The apartment hunt continues. I went to see a place last night--the location is GREAT, but the apartment was old. Appliances were new, but the wallpaper, paint and ceiling tiles needed major attention. And they are asking the same price as some of the "brand new" place I've seen! My friend at work told me today that her grandmother lived in the building 30 years ago--and I honestly don't think they've repainted since! I'm going to see another one tomorrow in a condo complex. I like the location, the woman who owns the condos that I'd be renting seems very very nice. Cross your fingers that it works!

On the bright side, NFN just sent out an email to my Monday group and I am beyond excited. It also made me giddy for October. Can't wait to see some of you!

finally!

2006-09-01T06:55:00.000-07:00

Blogger works. I head home to NJ for the weekend tonight, but I'll be back for work on Monday. No, HC is not closed on Labor Day--yippee ;) I can't wait to go home. This apartment hunting is sucking the life and joy out of me. I am so frustrated by the limited market in this area and lack of affordable, SAFE options. I just want to move already. Have I mentioned that I'm impatient?

Enough of that. It's September! Welcome to fall. It's the month I will return to my cozy spot on a floor in Northampton, even if I remain apartment-less.

And it's Friday. You know what that means. The iPod is DJ and no apron-wringing!

1. when i reach the place i'm goin' (the verdant mile)--tracy grammer
2. yesterday (1)--the beatles
3. preston miller (flower of avalon)--tracy grammer
4. one man wrecking machine (ganging up on the sun)--guster
5. hey conductor (tanglewood tree)--dave carter and tracy grammer
6. this is where it ends (born on a pirate ship)--barenaked ladies
7. ruby falls (ganging up on the sun)--guster
8. just like that (remembering rachel)--dar williams
9. hope alone (become you)--indigo girls
10. you may be right (essential collection)--billy joel
Bonus: what do you hear in these sounds (end of the summer)--dar williams

General Thoughts--A great set. This week, my iPod clearly fell for Tracy Grammer's voice, and really, who can blame it! I don' think there's a bad song here.

Seen Live--Tracy Grammer, Guster, Dar Williams, Indigo Girls, Billy Joel

Favorite Album--There are some great ones here...I'm having trouble deciding between Flower of Avalon and Tanglewood Tree. Dave Carter has definitely become one of my favorite song writers.

Favorite Lyric--And I thought that if we met, I would only start confessing/And they'd know that I was scared/They'd would know that I was guessing/But the wall came down and there they stood before me/With their stumbling and their mumbling/And their calling out just like me

i'm early too

2006-08-23T17:57:00.000-07:00

I'm early too. We have a stupid work retreat tomorrow. Here it is, my week in images.

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3)

4)

5)

6)

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8)

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10)

11)

12)

13)

quickly...

2006-08-21T21:27:00.000-07:00

I need to go to sleep. The cab is coming in 4 hours to take me to the airport (ahh, gotta love the 4:30 AM cab ride!). My heart is breaking a bit to leave the kids behind. You'll see some pictures later in the week, but they are simply the most gorgeous, loving, sweet children ever. We read and played and swam and smashed jellyfish and sang "Aiken Drum." I've fallen head-over-heels in love with them both and I don't want to leave them behind. It's been a great weekend, if only too short. Back to work tomorrow (today really).

random 10

2006-08-18T11:24:00.000-07:00

Let the iPod or other source of tunes play D.J. and let us know what it spins out. No apron-wringing!

1. cat eye willie claims his lover (tanglewood tree)--dave carter and tracy grammer
2. you may be right (the essential collection)--billy joel
3. maybe it's love (if you lived here, you'd be home now)--the nields
4. calling the moon (the green world)--dar williams
5. jeremy newborn street (if you lived here you'd be home now)--the nields
6. on the air (little star)--girlyman
7. farewell to the old me (beauty of the rain)--dar williams
8. fruitcakes (live at fenway park)--jimmy buffett
9. santa monica pier (good thing he can't read my mind)--christine lavin
10. even now (it's no secret anymore)--linda eder

General Thoughts: My iPod continues to favor the sisters Nields. Quite a folky set today...appropriate for a day when I'm going to see Dar in concert.

Seen Live: Tracy Grammer (unfortunately, I missed Dave Carter), Billy Joel, the Nields, Dar, Girlyman, Christine Lavin and Linda Eder

Really Enjoyed: Cat Eyed Willie, On the Air, Santa Monica Pier

Memory Trigger: When we were little, we listened to a LOT of Billy Joel--I mean, it's classic! My sister used to sing the line "Friday night I crashed your party" as "Friday night I crashed your body"...and my mom heard her singing it one day and couldn't believe that Billy Joel was singing about such a thing! Most of the time, I still sing it that way.

**I will "see" you all Tuesday. My flight leaves at 7 AM tomorrow for Philly and I will spend the weekend with my British cousins. Have fantabulous week!**

T13

2006-08-17T09:17:00.000-07:00

1. I am seeing Dar Williams in Lowell tomorrow night.

2. Saturday, I head south to meet my cousin Larissa's 2 munchkins. The family is in from London--I haven't seen Riss and her husband in 5.5 years. I have yet to meet their 3 year old, Minty, or their 1 year old, Ned.

3. While in MD, I'll be ever searching for pictures to serve the visual T13.

4. I love Coldstone Creamery.

5. I'm sad that I'll be no where near a TV for any of the 5 Yankee/RedSox games this weekend. Should be a bloodbath.

6. I told my roommate about the move. She isn't crazy about me moving out on the 15th. I figure I'm giving her 1 month's notice and that's sufficient. I have no lease and won't be made to feel guilty.

7. I'm already looking at pics I've taken and which ones I want to blow up as wall art for my very own place.

8. I taught a 5 year old to swim this week--the whole length of our inground pool.

9. This October, my parents will celebrate 30 years of marriage--and 25 years of living in my hometown.

10. If you were to look in my closet, 1/2 - 2/3 of my wardrobe is blue.

11. One of life's simple pleasures is an ice cold CAN of coke.

12. Our maintenance department came up this week and hung my office wall decor--a b&w photo of Manhattan looking south to north, pre 9-11--the Twin Towers stand proudly. Also, 3 frames with 4 3x3 openings each--one of b&ws of sights around my hometown, one of color shots of Ireland, one of b&ws of my favorite spots in Santa Monica, CA.

13. Most of the time, my boss and I are very much on the same page--it's scary at times.

the hunt

2006-08-14T16:43:00.000-07:00

So, after all the griping I did about apartment hunting, I just *may* have found the place on my first try. The building has recently had walls-out renovation...the renovation is so new, in fact, that they are still laying carpet in the hallways and touching up the paint. All new appliances in each apartment and electric heat. In-house security, which in this city is something I value...and on-site management and maintenance.

The price is a *bit* more than I was looking to pay, but I think I can swing it, particularly if I pick up some more babysitting gigs and some tutoring, which I plan on doing. I am looking at another place tomorrow, but made a follow-up at the place from Saturday to go over details, see if a Sept 15 move-in would be feasible. I was originally shooting for Sept 1, but that's Labor Day weekend and I think it'll be too hectic. I really do want to have it done during September though! Also, I feel like Sept 15 is giving fair warning to my current situation.

Now, I have to break it to the current landlord/roommate. I'm a little nervous about that. But I think I can sell it with the whole "I am ready to live on my own, by myself" bit, which is very true. I'm done with roommates, done with feeling like I'm hiding in my bedroom.

day late and a dollar short: random 10

2006-08-12T13:22:00.000-07:00

So, after work yesterday, I headed into Boston to see Guster at the Pavillion. I'd never been to the venue before--outdoors right on the harbor...a great location and boy, did the boys from Boston put on a great show!

I tried to use Pandora, but it won't work (can't hear it on this computer), so we'll just turn to the ol' iPod. I'm kicking it off with a song from last night, but we'll see where it spins after that. No apron-wringing!

1. barrel of a gun (lost and gone forever)--guster
2. mercy of the fallen (beauty of the rain)--dar williams
3. seven years (come away with me)--norah jones
4. he loves the road (love and china)--nerissa and katryna nields
5. sarah maria (gorilla)--james taylor
6. all together singing in the kitchen (all together singing in the kitchen)--the nields
7. an innocent man (the essential collection)--billy joel
8. the city of new orleans (hobo's lullaby)--arlo guthrie
9. teenagers, kick our butts (the end of summer)--dar williams
10. jack and diane (american fool)--john mellencamp

Random Thoughts: My iPod's crush on the sisters Nields continues.

Seen Live: Guster, Dar, The Nields, Billy Joel

Enjoying: Barrel of a Gun, Sarah Maria and Teenagers

Lyric with Best Use of Simile:
Fragile as a leaf in autumn/Just fallin' to the ground/Without a sound

thursday already!

2006-08-10T10:24:00.000-07:00

Time for another 13 random thoughts.

1. Mrs. Sullivan was my favorite teacher ever. I had her for first grade and even though she's the only teacher who ever gave me a "detention" (I was talking to Katherine in class), I still love her best.

2. We were released from "detention" early when Sr. Brigitta, the 3rd grade teacher, came in, gave us a blessing and had us apologize.

3. I had 3 nuns for teachers in grammar school and 4 or 5 in high school.

4. I took horse-back riding lessons for 2 years.

5. Apartment hunting is frustrating. I've never really had to do it before--during my teacher-service corps, housing was provided. Then I lived with family and this current living situation came together pretty quickly with not too much searching.

6. I have never lived alone--I'm both nervous and excited at the prospect.

7. I spent all 4 of my college spring breaks building houses--in Tennessee, Florida, Maine and Mississippi.

8. Most mornings, as I try to figure out what I'm wearing, I long for the 12 years when I wore a uniform.

9. I am looking forward to fall leaves.

10. I secretly love What Not to Wear on TLC.

11. My top 3 world destinations are Australia, Africa and Alaska.

12. I don't think I'll be seeing World Trade Center--I'm still not ready.

13. I have 3 phone calls to return right now.

a real blog

2006-08-09T12:09:00.000-07:00

Summer is flying by and all I seem to be able to do is post an occasional 13 or random 10. Today, the boss is out, our secretary is out and I'm having a less than productive day. So I might as well blog.

So, the news here is that I'm looking for an apartment. I go through this phase every few months, but I think I might be serious this time--LOL! I'm just tired of having roommates, tired of feeling like I have to hide in my room, tired of coming home from a weekend away to find that all my soda's been consumed and not replaced. None of these are HUGE deals, but in combination over time, I just feel like it's time to at least start looking for alternatives. The challenge is going to be finding something in a decent neighborhood that's as affordable as where I am now. I hate moving!

Other than that, it's pretty quiet on my end. Work is crazy--I signed 300 letters yesterday. My signature isn't a pretty thing under normal circumstances...by letter 100, it was pretty ugly! I'm looking forward to the coming Fridays--this week, I see Guster in Boston. Next week, Dar's playing an outdoor venue in Lowell and the following Friday, I believe I'm taking a few young tykes into Boston to see the sisters Nields play a kid's show. Plus my little side trip to Maryland to see my cousins' kids. I'm actually looking forward to the routine of fall at this point!

a belated 13

2006-08-06T10:27:00.000-07:00

I took a last minute trip to the Cape with my mom, aunt and nana from Tuesday evening til yesterday morning. I missed y'all.

1. I am singing and dancing to Tailspin right now. I also just got 2 new Dave and Tracy cds (Seven is the Number and Tanglewood Tree). I am a musically satisfied girl.

2. With all the travelling both near and far I've done this summer, I'm feeling a little scattered.

3. My bedroom (and my desk at work) reflect this!

4. Just when I thought my travels were over, I got a call yesterday saying that my cousin Larissa is coming from England for 2 weeks. She will be with her husband and their 2 young kids--so there will be another long weekend in the next 3 weeks--likely on MD's Eastern Shore.

5. As a result of my "scatteredness," I bought 2 desk calendars (one for work and one for home) and a new planner yesterday--to feign organization and planning.

6. I smiled a huge smile when I wrote in the October retreat at Big Yellow.

7. I love everything about the ocean--the sound, the smell, the saltiness it leaves on my skin. You could see the Vineyard from the beach this week and I just wanted to swim all the way there.

8. I am woefully out of shape. Every Sunday, I think, "This is going to be the week I start hitting the gym."

9. Considering I have access to the on-campus pool/track/gym for FREE, it's pathetic that I haven't gotten there yet.

10. In 10 months, my brother will graduate with his BA on a Sunday. We will then haul ass from western OH to NJ where my mother will graduate with her Ed.D. on Monday.

11. Though I love my current job and situation, I contemplate going back to school regularly--for about 6 different things.

12. When I taught, the younger kids all called me "Miss Q"--this turned into the big kids just calling me "Q"--I loved it all.

13. I have not been to church in a couple of months. I am feeling a wee bit guilty and need to get in the habit again.

T.G.I.F.!!!

2006-07-28T11:51:00.000-07:00

It's Friday again. This weekend will be spent hanging around the house, relaxing, swimming, some grocery shopping. I'm looking forward to a bit of downtime.

Alright, here we go. You know the drill. Shuffle up and deal. No apron-wringing!

1. party generation (end of summer)--dar williams
2. heading home (love and china)--nerissa and katryna nields
3. happy frappy (parachute)--guster
4. strangers like me (disney's greatest hits 3)--phil collins
5. love me do (1)--the beatles
6. jennifer falling down (play)--the nields
7. this town is wrong (if you lived here, you'd be home now)--the nields
8. mona lisa (parachute)--guster
9. stupid (afterglow)--sarah mclachlan
10. phantom doll (flower of avalon)--tracy grammer

Seen Live: Dar, N&K, Guster, Tracy

Majorly enjoying: Heading Home, Happy Frappy, Phantom Doll--this is a pretty stellar set, though.

Memory Trigger: Strangers Like Me used to stop my friend's son from crying on a dime. The opening chords would sound, and even if Ben was in major meltdown mode, he'd immediately stop crying and listen intently.

Favorite Lyric: will i say "i love you" even when they are just words/the way words sometimes are when you pray

thursday thirteen...the frff edition

2006-07-27T09:50:00.000-07:00

4 days later, and I'm still carrying a bit of Falcon Ridge with me. Here are some of the hilights/lessons learned:

1. Arriving in the daylight (as I did this year) is FAR superior to arriving after 9 PM and pitching a tent in the dark (as I did last year).

2. There is NOTHING better than sitting around laughing and catching up with old friends. Somehow, though the other 2 members of our camp also live in MA, Al and I only manage to see them at FRFF. They are wickedly funny.

3. *Always* wear disposable shoes at FRFF. You never know when you're going to have to navigate gushing streams of mud. My FR flipflops were tossed as we packed up camp on Sunday.

4. Falcon Ridge always holds musical gems that you don't expect. This year, I discovered Dan Bern (hilarious), TaxiChain (very cool) and was introduced to Shawn Colvin's folky side.

5. A Friday Night Song Swap that includes Susan Werner, Christine Lavin and Cheryl Wheeler WILL make you laugh til it hurts.

6. Old favorites never fail to amaze you at FR. There's just a magic about it all. Crooked Still, Tracy Grammer and the Nields put together some of the best sets and workshops I've ever attended.

7. *Never* complain about the sun and the heat. It will come back to bite you in the ass.

8. Embrace the rain--as long as your tent stays dry and the music plays on, how bad can it really be? Muddy, rain soaked hillsides can come in handy and save property and lives.

9. When you are evacuated from your tent at 3 AM due to fire, grab a blanket. Otherwise, you will freeze for 3 hours in the damp, muddy cold. (How many times can the word "mud" be used in one blog entry anyway?)

10. Less than 48 hours is *plenty* of time to establish wonderful friendships that continue to grow. Big Yellow reunions rock and I can't wait for October.

11. Sometimes, you just have to put on clean, dry clothes and pretend that mud isn't caked all over your ankles, feet and legs. It's the only way to get some sleep.

12. Emergency cookies and apples taste better at 4:30 AM than cookies and apples have ever tasted before.

13. As you drive away from the farm--exhausted, filthy, drained and sunburned--you can't help but ask "How many days til Falcon Ridge '07?"

Big Yellow friends, how did we manage to NOT take a photo of the 6 of us together?

rain, flood, fire and mud...my weekend at frff

2006-07-24T10:19:00.000-07:00

I am home (well, at work right now).
I am clean.
I am dry.
I am tired.
I am riding a high from good friends and good music.

When I arrived at Dodd's Farm on Thursday, I was a little grouchy. Work had been crummy on Wednesday and I still felt like grumbling and raging. However, as we drove down Rte. 22 towards Hillsdale, I caught a glimpse of multicolored tents and tarps through the trees. I gasped at the beauty of it and suddenly forgot all the work worries. The new farm was great...and the vibe and soul of Falcon Ridge was the same. As I parked my car to get my wristband, the volunteers greeted us with a "Welcome home!" And it really does feel like home.

Maybe it's just me, but I think the music was better than ever this year. Clearly, N&K's energy was better than usual being back on stage after 3 months...I thought NFN was going to jump right off the stage during Tailspin! Other favorites did not disappoint either...Crooked Still, Tracy Grammer (who is just sublime), Lowen and Navarro and EFO had us singing and dancing in our seats. I laughed until my sides hurt with the likes of Christine Lavin, Cheryl Wheeler and Susan Werner. And DD's fave, Dan Bern, had us all laughing hard and ignoring the rain well into the wee morning hours.

Speaking of rain, after a SCORCHING Friday, the rains did come on Saturday. Everything from sprinklings to drizzles to outright downpours...the field of green became a muddy mess. And less than an hour after climbing into our tent, finally dry, in clean clothes and with substantially LESS mud on our feet and legs, AL and I woke up to screaming and talk of 911. A car had caught fire about 50 yards from our tent...we quickly decided to abandon camp, abandon the car and head down the hill in case things got worse. Fire officials had trouble getting up the hill due to mud, but thanks to the ground being wet and tents being wet, etc., the fire didn't spread and just burned out a car or 2. So, in the end, thank God for the rain. It could've been a lot worse.

By far, the hilight of the weekend for me was catching up with my Big Yellow friends. Those of you who couldn't be with us were missed, but it was great to see A, N, J, T and C. T and C, I'm sorry we didn't get to catch up more! I looked around during N&K's mainstage set to see all of your smiling faces and was amazed at the sense of community that had been formed in less than 48 hours.

I'm not sure how coherent I was here and I'm sure that N, J, A, T and C will also have blog entries about this weekend, probably more coherent than mine. I arrived home yesterday exhausted and drained as I did 3 loads of laundry and scrubbed off the mud. I loved every minute of it though!

kissing the new england soil

2006-07-16T10:31:00.000-07:00

I've returned from the South. I was the only Yankee in the ranks, so I spent some time deciphering the "southern-ese" spoken in every session. It was a good conference though, learned some interesting things, met some nice people. I'm always glad to meet other professionals in my line of work and realize that I'm not alone in my struggles and that this is a new area of focus for institutions. We're all working without a net. I'm also glad HC doesn't have the tradition of WEARING the school color in professional settings the way that Clemson does. HC Purple is not much more flattering than Clemson Orange.

One of my favorite moments was when I drove past an intersection in SC that had a Dollar General on one corner, an El Cheapo gas station on the other and a Family Dollar on a third corner. About a mile down the road, I found a Dollar Superstore. Also, on the highways and roads leading into campus, there are big orange paw prints, for the Clemson tigers, don'tcha know?

How did it get to be July 16?! FalconRidge is a mere 4 days away and I'm thrilled, but also disturbed! This summer is flying by. I have to go now to do some more shopping for the weekend. I'll be around, but busy this week, so don't worry too much if I disappear. My goal is to post my "road not taken" thoughts by Wednesday. It's been so interesting and enjoyable to read your thoughts.

early 10 and 13

2006-07-11T14:03:00.000-07:00

I'm off to South Carolina. Should be hot and sticky--yippee ;) I thought I'd treat you all to a random 10 and a *Tuesday* thirteen.

I set the 'pod a'shufflin. No skipping tracks or rationalizing.

And the winners are:
1. Romeo and Juliet (Rites of Passage)--Indigo Girls
2. Your Fire, Your Soul (Beauty of the Rain)--Dar Williams
3. Red, Red Robin (All Together Singing in the Kitchen)--The Nields
4. Forever Young (Forever Young)--Alphaville
5. Lightning Rod (Ganging Up on the Sun)--Guster
6. Two Points for Honesty (Lost and Gone Forever)--Guster
7. So Close to My Heart (My Better Self)--Dar Williams
8. You Like Me Too Much (Help!)--Beatles
9. Rebecca (Pat McGee)--Pat McGee Band
10. California (The Guest)--Phantom Planet
Bonus: Closer to Fine (Indigo Girls)--Indigo Girls

Seen Live: Indigo Girls, Dar, Nields, Guster, Phantom Planet (as a guster opening)

Good Tunes: Your Fire, Your Soul; Red, Red Robin; Lightning Rod; Rebecca; Closer to Fine

And Not So Much: Romeo and Juliet

Favorite Album: The "newest" albums on this list were all *really* pleasant surprises...I get nervous that new CDs won't be as good as the last, or the first. But Guster's Ganging Up on the Sun is fabulous. Dar's My Better Self is different, but really fabulous. The Nields' latest, All Together Singing in the Kitchen, is delightfully fun.

Least Favorite Album: Well, I only have the one song on it, but I'll go with Alphaville's Forever Young because I just can't imagine it being good!

Memory Trigger: In that same veing, Forever Young is a trigger...I spent 2 summers as a counselor/RA for an academic "camp" in Lancaster, PA. We had 10 dances in a 6 week period and Forever Young was part of the "Canon" that we played at EVERY dance, along with classics like Istanbul, End of the World, Bizarre Love Triangle and American Pie. This song takes me back to a hot, steamy quad, with 600 teenagers dancing all around me.

Favorite Lyric: Could you wear something that celebrates/Everything you love and maybe/What your family hates
************************************
Tuesday Thirteen
1. I have 2 scars on my right forearm from where I had 13 screws and 2 plates inserted.

2. I fell 30 feet out of a chairlift and snapped my arm in half.

3. I love thunderstorms.

4. I am practically counting the hours til FRFF.

5. I am spending the night in Brighton, MA tonight.

6. I'm a little nervous about going to this conference by my lonesome. What if no one talks to me?

7. When I was younger, my mom had my hair permed.

8. I love to fly.

9. I'm planning to coach a 10 year old b-ball team this winter with a co-worker.

10. My first concert was Billy Joel/Elton John at Giants Stadium.

11. I am a Yankees fan (ducks for cover).

12. I was a Yankee fan when they were the worst team in baseball--not a carpetbagger.

13. I'm determined to teach myself the guitar, but I haven't picked it up in months.

love

2006-07-10T06:55:00.000-07:00

I am in love, my friends. His name is Jack. He has long arms and endless legs. His fingers are long and skinny. His mouth is kissable and he has deep, soulful blue-grey eyes. His jet black hair is looks ready for a mohawk. My heart melted the moment I saw him.

He is 6 days old.

My weekend was delightful. Friday night, I went into Boston with friends from work for tapas--YUM! Saturday, after seeing my boss' daughter play in a b-ball game, I headed home to NY/NJ for my cousin's college grad party. The apartment is at 22nd and Park and we were on the roof. It was a perfect NYC evening...not too hot, not too humid, no rain...we watched the sun set over the Hudson and had a view of the Chrysler, Empire State and Met Life buildings. Make-your-own-fajita dinner, surrounded by cousins (some of whom I saw in NC, some of whom I didn't), a little time with my parents, siblings and grandmother...it was a great night. Without fail, these nights turn into an opportunity to tell stories about my mom and her cousins growing up, or my generation of cousins as kids. Always fun.

Yesterday, I headed north, with a stop off in CT to see baby Jack. He'd just finished eating, so he was full and happy...he passed out in my arms for an hour and a half...I could have sat there with him all day.

I'm only here today and tomorrow at work, then I head to SC for a conference Wednesday til Friday. I have so much to do at work that I'm a bit overwhelmed, but it'll all get done.